Isle of Sodor Premier League news – Phil Cotton’s star burns out, released from Arlesburgh Utd.

May 8, 2019 – Ffarquhar, Sodor

Image result for Philippe Coutinho funnyThink Barcelona about to the former Liverpool star Philppe Coutinho the heave-ho is a surprise?   [Here’s the CBSsports.com article on that likely one-time superstar’s release.]    At Ffarquhar FC, the one-time Arlesbugh Utd.  star midfielder Phil Cotton is out.    The biggest preseason move by any Sudric club has been a bust.

Image result for FFFC football crest The decision to let Cotton go is one no one could’ve seen coming a few months ago.  But this past weekend, the club dropped back into a tie for 17th/18th place – right on the Relegation line- after blowing a 3-0 halftime lead before losing to Crovan’s Gate 3-4.

Said Ffarquhar FC president Magnus Clucas:

Thank you to Phil Cotton for his efforts with our club.  His astounding 11 goals in the three matches of the group stage of last summer's inaugural FA Cup are hardly distant memory, obviously.  That run of his with Arlesburgh United to their Cup runners-up finish was why he brought him over.  We know there will be other clubs willing to roster him for the 2019-20 season.

To be fair, he's been injured as oft as not.  But when he's been healthy, Cotton just hasn't performed like a starter for us.  And so, we haven't always even made him one.   Three goals in 19 matches played wasn't what we envisioned.

But the last straw was his bitching about the locker room spread.  Look, we added the create-your-own-potato bar he contractually demanded.  If he wanted more than that and sandwich fixins', the time to address that was behind closed doors before Signing Day.

Image result for potato bar

Thankfully, there is good news for Ffarquhar fans.  While he may or may not be able to help the club stave off possible Relegation these last four matches, part-time starter and Cotton-replacement Mike Fourton has about eight months to get in game shape for the 2019-20 campaign.

Image result for funny amateur soccer player

Author: Soccernoob

After a year of previewing soccer matches the world over with my own off-brand comedy, I now provide exclusive coverage for the Isle of Sodor Premier League, Championship, and FA Cup. (FC Dryaw 'til I die.)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *