Category: 10 to Track

’10 to Track’ for Friday, 1/12 — from Liga MX to…Myanmar??

TGIGF!    Noob always endeavors to Track with Noobites the ten most important soccer games from around the world.  On Fridays, our perspective – that of the newish American soccer fan – has to be broadened.

The “big” leagues are gearing up for their weekend slates.  But we never rest!  We start with locales more known, but then whisk away to all parts of the planet.  Come, it’s a footyball adventure.

  1. Bayer Leverkusen vs. Bayern Munich – Bundesliga

How dominant is Munich?   4th-place Leverkusen haven’t lost since September 20 and yet trail the league leaders by 13 points in the table.

This match is still really important despite Munich’s unstoppability.   Four teams get berths into the next Champions League, and Leverkusen is actually tied with two other teams for that last one.

RESULT:   Munich   1-3

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But could Bayern contend with T-Rex with attached grabber-arms?

B.  Tijuana vs. Necaxa – Liga MX

Neither of these two made the league postseason Liguilla for the Apertura (first half).  They’ll both be looking to capitalize on not starting off the Clausura against a league powerhouse.   Based on recent results, this should be perhaps the closest Tracked match of the day.

RESULT:   Tijuana   1-0

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You creep Noob out, Number Two.   

Bring on Number B.

  1. Sheffield United vs. Sheffield Wednesday – EFL Championship

Noob’s been referring to this as the “English Championship League”, but this seems to be more correct for the second-tier league there.

7th vs. 16th might not always catch Noob’s wandering football eye, but intracity rivalries always have a certain cache.  Plus, 3rd through 6th place play off at season’s end to determine a team that gets promoted to Premier.

RESULT:   0-0

  1. Real Oviedo vs. Rayo Vallecano – Segunda B

In Spain’s second division, we get two teams that are vying to be promoted.  Just like in EFL Championship, the top two automatically move up, and the next four determine one more with a playoff.  These two are in 3rd and 5th respectively.

Fun Fact:  The city of Oviedo was featured in the Woody Allen movie “Vicki Cristina Barcelona”.

RESULT:   2-2      had the home and away sides turned around

Image result for cassandra's dream

 

Noob may stand alone, but Woody Allen’s worst received movie – “Cassandra’s Dream” – was his best.

  1. Fortuna Sittard vs. Jong Ajax – Eerste Divisie

Only one club in the Netherlands’ second division gets promoted to top-flight Eredivisie, and right now that’s Sittard.  By a point.  Ajax’s reserve squad is in 3rd, ineligible for promotion.

RESULT:   Sittard   2-1

  1. Al-Wasl vs. Al-Ain – Arabian Gulf League

Why U.A.E.?  One of the best leagues in the region.  And these two are tied for 1st place.

In addition to getting the best seeding of all teams entering the next AFC Champions League from this country, the winner will also make the next Club World Cup as the nation-host representative.

RESULT:   Al-Ain   1-3

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Why else U.A.E.?

  1. Al Ahed vs. Al Shabab Al Arabi – Lebanon Premier

Al Ahed only lead Al Nejmeh by a single point in the table for 1st place.  The defending champs should have little trouble against second-to-last place Shabab.

RESULT:   Al Ahed   1-0

  1. Senglea Athletic vs. Lija Athletic – Maltese Premier

These two were promoted from the second division last year.  Lija’s going right back down.  They get outscored by nearly a 3:1 pace.  Senglea’s only a few spots up the table, but clear of the Relegation Zone at least.

RESULT:   Senglea   2-0

Image result for you suck funny

  1. Zwekapin United vs. Shan United – Myanmar National League

Welcome to the Track, Myanmar!

The season is just getting going here.  Shan Utd. are the defending champions, while Zwekapin finished 8th last year.

Fun Fact:  Though it developed in Sri Lanka, the majority of Kayin State’s (where Zweakpin is) people are Theravada Buddhists.

RESULT:   0-0

  1. Al Ahli vs. Al Gharafa – Qatar Stars League

8th place hosts 6th here.

Fun Fact:  Al Ahli is one of eight teams from Doha, Qatar.  They only share their stadium, though, with one other top-flight team (Al-Sailiya).

RESULT:   Al Gharafa   1-2

Image result for camel racing qatar

 

Qatari camel racing at Al Shahniya.

Is making them try and beat cars fair?  Dammit, PETA!

’10 to Track’ for midweek 1/9-11 – Cups galore!

T2T, where our Cups runneth over for the Tuesday-Thursday edition.  Noob did sneak in one World Cup tuneup, but other than that its all Knockout action, baybeeee.

At bottom, also check out how The Management, Dan the Intern-0 Inferno, and Noob fared in week one of our Prognostication Challenge.

Tuesday, 1/9

Quick refresher on the three major Cup tournaments in England:

FA Cup – most prestigious, open to teams down to league pyramid level 20.  EFL Cup – second-most prestigious, open to top four leagues.  EFL Trophy – open to the third and fourth-tier leagues, plus youth teams affiliated with the top two leagues’ clubs

  1. Manchester City vs. Bristol City – EFL Cup

This event has reached its Semifinal Round.  This is the only round in which the teams will play two-legged ties.

Bristol City are in 4th in the second-tier Championship League.  Groovy Minnow Watch time!  But Man City lead the mighty Premier League and could put this away very early.

RESULT:   Man City   2-1      Bristol had a 1-0 lead, but Man City got the winning goal at 90′.

Image result for disco ball soccer ball

 

 

Groovy, baby.

B.  Yeovil Town vs. Forest Green Rovers – EFL Trophy

This tournament is in its Third Round (Round of 16).

Neither of these sides is having at all a good season in League Two.   Advantage here to the Noob-Adopted Yeovillians!   They have the better offense and, of course, get to play it at their place.

RESULT:   Yeovil Town   2-0

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Splendid number B’s in forest green

  1. Nice vs. AS Monaco – French League Cup

The Coupe de la Ligue has reached its Quarterfinals.  This is the French equivalent of England’s EFL Cup.

Nice is in 6th in Ligue 1, AS Monaco 2nd.  It’s a very top-heavy league.  Record and goal differential would indicate Nice aren’t even an average club really.  Still, when you get to host, all things are possible.

RESULT:   Monaco   1-2

  1. Leon vs. Venados – Copa MX (Clausura)

Mexico divides its 2017-18 season into two halves – Apertura and Clausura.  The latter is just beginning, for both league and Copa play.   Liga MX and second-tier Ascenso MX teams play the Copas.

Leon was a top-half team in Liga MX.  Venados, which were until recently FC Méridas, had a middling Clausura in the Ascenso League.

RESULT:   Leon 1-0

Image result for venados fc

Wednesday, 1/10

  1. Chelsea vs. Arsenal – EFL Cup

No Minnow action here.  Premier League #3 hosts #6 in a monster matchup.  Statistically, Arsenal don’t score or defend as well as any team above them in the table.  This was an unlucky draw for them, having to go on the road.

  1. Shrewsbury Town vs. Blackpool – EFL Trophy

Oh, Blackpool.  Noob loves loves LOVES your tangerine kits.

But this is Shrewsbury, fellas.   They are Adopted by Noob!   If ever an inglorious traitor like Harry “Hotspur” Percy is ever killed in your town, you will be treated in kind.

Image result for shrewsbury death hotspur painting

 

 

Shrewsbury is forever hallowed ground.

  1. Juarez vs. Lobos de la BUAP – Copa MX (Clausura)

Juarez won the Apertura title, and BUAP didn’t make much noise in Liga MX that session.  At home, the Ascenso hosts have a real shot at three points here.

  1. Caldas vs. Farense – Portugal FA Cup

The Taça de Portugal is in its Quarterfinal, and here we get double Minnow action!  Both sides are from the third- tier of Portuguese football.  Farense lead their division while Caldas are just having a “meh” kind of year.

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“Meh” since can’t tell if Panda’s martini is full or she’s down to the olive.

 

 

Thursday, 1/11

  1. Sweden vs. Denmark – international friendly

These two are FIFA-rated 18th and 12th respectively.  They’re likely both working out roster spots and keeping tuned up for next year’s World Cup.

Fun Fact:   This will be the first World Cup in which three Nordic teams have qualified for Group Stage.  (Iceland is in as well.)

  1. Sevilla vs. Cadiz – Copa del Rey

Sevilla won the first leg of this Round of 16 matchup 0-2.  Really not much hope for 2nd place, second-tier Cadiz.  Still, this match does represent the best chance for a non-La Liga team to break through.

Image result for cadiz fc

PROGNOSTICATION CHALLENGE

The Management, Dan the Intern-o Inferno, and Noob started this last week.  We will make picks for all T2T Midweek Edition matches, straight up.

Scoring:  One point for a correct pick, two if someone correctly pickes a designated big Underdog.  No points for incorrect picks or drawn games.

Week 1:  The Management and Dan -4.  Noob – 3

Noob’s lulling them into a false sense of security

Week 2 picks:

Noob:  Man City, Yeovil, AS Monaco, Leon, Chelsea, Shrewsbury, Juarez, Farense, Cadiz, Sweden

Dan:   Bristol, Forest Green (citing “cool factor”), Nice, Leon, Chelsea, Shrewsbury, Juarez, Caldas, Sweden (high taxes, beautiful women, and Nordic cold!  what more could you ask for?), Cadiz

The Management:  Man City, Yeovil, Nice, Leon, Arsenal, Blackpool, BUAP, Farense, Cadiz, Denmark

’10 to Track’ for Relegation Monday – 1/8

Ah, Relegation Monday.  A day to learn about teams facing demotion from their leagues.  Embrace their sadness, Noobites.  Get to know them before they fade away into the lower tiers.

But first, a couple games of more traditional importance!

  1. Brighton & Hove Albion vs. Crystal Palace – English FA Cup

Third Round.  B&H are having a sensational year for a team that was just promoted to Premier this season, 12th in the league table.  Though they have trouble on offense (17 goals in 22 games is all), a home match against their 14-place guests is quite doable.

RESULT:   B&H   2-1      Game-winner scored in the 87′

Image result for brighton & hove albion funny

 

 

B&H Seagull mascot in a smartly-slimming shirt

B.  El Zamalek vs. Al Ahly – Egyptian Premier League

This league sends two teams to the next African Champions League cup.  If tied for 4th-Zamalek harbors any hopes of getting one, this is nearly a must-win.  #2 Al Ahly has eight points up on them in the table, and sports the league’s best offense and defense.

RESULT:   Al Ahly   0-3

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Egyptian hieroglyphic number B.

  1. Málaga vs. Espanyol – La Liga

Málaga is 19th out of 20 Spanish teams, and this team demotes three clubs to Second Division at season’s end.  Any chance of escaping the Drop starts with home matches against subpar teams like 15th place Espanyol.  Neither of these clubs can score, but Málaga’s defense is almost nonexistent as well.

RESULT:   Espanyol   0-1

  1. Estoril vs. Feirense – Primeira Liga

Two teams will get the boot from this league, and Estoril is in second-to-last.  They have Portugal’s nearly worst offense and the very worst defense.  Still, Feirense is just up the table in 13th.  They can’t score either, but they don’t give up much either.

Fun Fact:   One doesn’t have to feel sorry for Estoril fans.  They are based in one of the very richest towns in the whole country.

RESULT:   Feirense   0-2

Image result for pity the rich

  1. Aris Limassol vs. Doxa Katakopia – Cypriot First Division

By keeping overall scoring low in their games, Aris has managed 7 draws in 17 games.  Unfortunately, combined with only one win, that leaves them in second-to-last, ripe for Relegation.  Doxa is in 6th.

Fun Fact:  Aris have their own choir.

RESULT:   Aris   1-0      It’s a Relegation Monday miracle!

  1. Liberia vs. Saprissa – Costa Rica Premier

Liberia finished the Apertura (first-half season) in last.  Saprissa is, in Noob’s humble opinion, one of the great North American clubs.  They finished 2nd.  Liberia would do well to lose even by just two, even at home.

RESULT:   Saprissa   0-3      (this game was played the day before)

Image result for saprissa

  1. Ironi Akko vs. Ashkelon – Ligat Haal

The bottom eight of 14 teams will play a Relegation avoidance tournament at season’s end here in Israel’s top-flite.  The home side is tied for last in the league, while the visitors are only a little higher at 11th.

Fun Fact:  Akko (also knows as “Acre”), is the holiest city in the world for those of the Bahá’í religion.

RESULT:   Ashkelon   0-1

  1. Churchill Brothers vs. East Bengal Club – Indian I League

The home team has yet to even achieve a draw, let alone a win (0-0-5).   “The Red Machine” will likely remain hurting today.  EBC is #1 in the league.

Fun Fact:   Churchill Bros. is owned by an alleged gold smuggler.

RESULT:   1-1

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This guy’s behind DVR’ed “Game of Thrones”, amazingly.

  1. Al-Hilal vs. Al-Ettifaq – Saudi Pro League

Cheat-game!  Ettifaq were in the bottom two when Noob was scouting for this post a few days ago.  Since then, they have climbed one spot in the standings and out of Relegation Zone by tiebreaker.  They will get gobsmacked by #1 Hilal.

RESULT:   1-1

  1. Ironi Eilat vs. Ironi Beit Shemesh – Liga Bet

Welcome to the T2T, Israel’s fourth–highest league!

Liga Bet is broken into several Divisions hosts #2 in this division.  The bottom two from each are automatically dropped into Liga Gimel.   Beit Shemesh is in last place, and Eilat is only four points up the table.

Fun Fact:  Shemesh was a Canaanite sun goddess.

RESULT:   Bnei Eilat   4-0

Image result for shemesh sun goddess

 

The goddess would never  ride cutie mark-less “blank flanks” in ancient My Little Pony.

’10 to Track’ for wknd 1/6-7 – and at last, ladies in the house

T2T always is at its pinnacle on the weekend.  The ten most important matches from around the world are of the highest quality these days.  If you like football and shiny things, welcome home.

Monday, 1/6

  1. Yeovil Town vs. Bradford City – English FA Cup

The Third Round Rolls on!  Noob’s selected this game out of many because the big fun of FA Cups is looking for Minnows.  These are teams from lower divisions of soccer making deep runs into tournaments.  It doesn’t hurt that Yeovil are an Adopted team of Noob’s, either.

Yeovil are having an abysmal year in fourth-tier League Two, but getting this far has to have them feeling mighty fine.  And they as good a draw as can be expected, getting to host a team only one division up the pyramid.  Bradford City are in 5th, and truth be told, the smart money is on them.

RESULT:   Yeovil   2-0   Upset City!

Image result for stupid money

 

 

 

Heath was arguably not as smart about money.

B.  Monterey vs. Morelia – Liga MX

The second-half season (Clausura) of Mexico’s top league is just beginning.  Monterrey won the first half (Apertura) regular season and the postseason tournament.   They start off here hosting 4th place Morelia.

Morelia are the Monarchs, and if there’s one thing Noob despises almost as much as clubs that name themselves “real” (royal) in nations that don’t have kings and queens, it’s ones named Monarchs.  Relocate to Spain, you cretinous yahoos!

RESULT:   1-1     Darn you, Monarchs!   They got the tying goal at 90′.

Image result for defile the letter B

 

 

And here Morelia lolls about, defiling the lovely number B!

  1. AS Roma vs. Atalanta – Serie A

Italy’s top-flight #4 hosts #9.   This game’s importance is more about Roma, as they occupy the last spot in the table which will receive a 2018 Champions League invite.   They’re only up on Lazio by two points.  The league’s best defense should be able to hold serve at home.

RESULT:   Atalanta   1-2      Upset City, part two!

  1. Atletico Madrid vs. Getafe – La Liga

Atletico isn’t likely to catch 1st place Barcelona or fall out of the all-important top four.  Getafe’s down in 8th, but have a better goal differential than the two teams ahead of them.   They could well make a move on a Europa League berth yet.

RESULT:   Atletico   2-0

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Bet you anything the player back-left here’s jersey number is 212121.

 

 

Sunday, 1/7

  1. Newport County vs. Leeds United – English FA Cup

We’re back on Minnow Watch, Noobites!  Newport Country is a very good League Two side.  They’re probably overmatched by a very good division-two team here.  But Newport gets them at home, so there’s always a chance.

Fun Fact:  Newport County were known for a time as “The Exiles” for being forced to play away from their one-time home pitch on account of unpaid rent.

RESULT:   Newport   2-1

  1. Chelsea Ladies vs. Arsenal – Women’s Super League

Welcome to T2T, gals!   First-time coverage with Noob.  WSL is England’s top league in women’s football, and they’re just a few games into their season.

Chelsea are undefeated and in 2nd.  Based on goal differential, they and Manchester Utd. are easily the class of the league.  Arsenal are in 3rd.

Noobstradamus has had a vision of these women, predicts a 3-0 drubbing at the hands of the home team.

RESULT:   Chelsea   3-2     I had some estrogen in my third eye

Image result for Noobstradamus

 

 

You make the vision  sound a little pervy.  Rephrase?

 

  1. Toluca vs. Guadalajara – Liga MX

Today’s three Mexican offerings don’t look competitive on paper.  But here at Noob, we’ll never ignore our North American neighbors any day even one game is offered.

This one is most likely to see an upset though.  Toluca finished 5th in the Apertura to Guadalajara’s 13th.   Noob is partial to the visitors, as they are the Goats.   You never see Amuricuhn teams named Goats.

RESULT:   1-1

  1. FC Still 1930 vs. Troyes – Coupe de France

France’s FA Cup, and do we have a mighty Minnow chance here in the Round of 64!  FC Still is in the eighth tier of French soccer, fully amateur, taking on Ligue 1 Troyes.  Tier eight is so low, I couldn’t even find a league table online.

Good thing we have Dan the Intern-o Inferno at the ready.

RESULT:   Troyes   0-1

Image result for slacking at work

 

 

FC Still Sleeping

  1. Sporting CP vs. Maritimo – Primeira Liga

Portugal’s top league has lost a little of its luster in recent years, is now down to only getting two invites to Champions League.  2nd-place Sporting CP hasn’t lost yet, but neither have Porto, and one-loss Benfica is close behind.

Maritimo keeps scores low, gives themselves at least a puncher’s chance.

RESULT:   Sporting   5-0

  1. Anorthosis vs. AEK Larnaca – Cypriot First Division

2nd hosts 1st in a stronger league than perhaps Noob realized.   According to IFFHS (actual official world football stat nerds), Cyprus’ was the 16th-strongest league around as recently as a year ago.

Full disclosure though, these two teams have played a couple more games than some other teams just behind them in the standings.  Yet that makes this match all the more important.  These two both need three points to help withstand the coming charge, particularly from Apollon Limassol.

RESULT:   Anorthosis   3-1

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Urkel’s been out of the sun SO long getting his football stats on…

’10 to Track’ for 1/5 Globetrotting Friday! – and the return of the FA Cup

TGIGF!  Noob always delights in bringing the ten most important games for us – the newish American soccer fans – to Track and enjoy.  Friday’s, our compass gets a little wild though.

Since offering from the “big” leagues are lighter, we take advantage and trot the globe!   Soccers sights unseen and exotic locales await us.  But not before we start with some more familiar places.

  1. Liverpool vs. Everton – English FA Cup

The FA Cup is now in its Third Round.  And goodness has Everton run into the wrong team at the wrong time.  They’ve lost to Noob-fave yet struggling-Bournemouth and at home to Manchester Utd. in their last two.

Meanwhile, Liverpool haven’t lost a match since more than a week before Halloween.

RESULT:   Liverpool   2-1      Liverpool’s new defender – whom they’d just spent a record 75 million pounds on, scored the willing goal at 84′.

B.  Manchester United vs. Derby County – FA Cup

Speak of the Red Devils, and thus they appear in number B!

Man Utd. Gets to play host and villain to Championship League (tier two) Derby County.  The visiting Rams have won seven matches in a row, but that won’t mean much against the Premier side.

RESULT:   Man Utd.   2-0      Man Utd. dominated statistically, but didn’t get the first goal ’til 84′.

Image result for letter B funny

 

 

 

Oh, silly number B.

  1. Fiorentina vs. inter Milan – Serie A

Fiorentina is in 7th, just one spot in the table out of a Europa League berth.  At home, beating 3rd-place Inter wouldn’t be an absolute stunner.  But Noobstradamus is calling this one for “the Big Grass Snake”, 0-1.  The hosts just don’t have the offense to take down the very best.

RESULT:   1-1

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Noobstradamus also predicts someone will start a crowdfunding crusade to get that whorish broccoli some damn pants.

  1. Atlas vs. Leon – Liga MX

The Clausura is now beginning.  For newer Noobites, Liga MX divides its season into two parts.  The Apertura was the first half-season, and so now this is second-half.

This match pits last Apertura’s 8th and 7th-place teams against one another.  Atlas tries to button things down a little more than Atlas, so look for this to be settled with a single goal.

RESULT:   Leon   1-2

Image result for spanish lessons funny

 

 

 

No…

  1. Oman vs UAE – Arabian Gulf Cup

The Final!   It’s the end of the ride in Kuwait City.  UAE beat Oman 1-0 when they played in the Group Stage.  UAE carries the shinier FIFA ranking, but how does one pick against the Omani?  No one’s scored on them in regulation this entire tournament.

RESULT:   Oman   0-0 / 5-4 PK      Congrats to the Cup champions!

  1. Mumbai City vs. Jamshedpur – Indian Super League

5th hosts 6th place in one of India’s two top-flight leagues.

Jamshedpur is one of the two expansion teams this year.   And Noob is in love love love and doesn’t care who knows it!  Jaaayyyyummm.

Still, fellas, how about opening up the games a little?  They’ve given up and scored two goals all season is all.

RESULT:   2-2

Image result for this is my jam

  1. Dhaka Abahani vs. Sheik Jamal – Bangladesh Premirer

No matter where in the world, Noob is down with a #1-#2 matchup!

Fun Fact:  D.A. are the “Sky Blue Brigade”.   Note what’s missing from their crest.

RESULT:   Dhaka Abahani   2-0

Image result for dhaka abahani crest

  1. TAFIC vs. Extension Gunners – Botswana Premier

The hosts here are at the bottom of the league.  E.G. sits halfway up the table in 7th.

Fun Fact:  Francistown – home of TAFIC – is surrounded by old, abandoned gold mines.

RESULT:    ppd

Image result for mine Scooby Doo

 

 

But maybe not abandoned of MYSTERIES!

  1. Indera vs. Tebuan Muda – Brunei Super League

Indera are safely in 3rd place, with little real hope of climbing or fear of sinking in the table.   Things are tighter nearer the bottom, as T.M. is in a tie for 7th.

Fun Fact, if you like Scrabble: ‘Indera’ anagrams to RAINED and DENARI, a Macedonian currency unit (pl.).

RESULT:   Indera   3-0

  1. Jong Colombia vs. Hubentut Fortuna – Curaçao Sekshon Pagá

9th place hosts last in this top-flight, semi-pro league.

Fun Fact:  Curaçao are a member of CONCACAF (North and Central America plus Caribbean countries).  They’re barely off the coast of South America, so this seems at least a little odd.

RESULT:   Jong   2-0

Image result for geography is hard funny

 

Be gone, Gerry Butler! 

Don’t you have another bad rom-com to make instead of teaching geography?

’10 to Track’ for midweek 1/2-4 – Premier League meets Thomas the Tank Engine-edition

The ten most important soccer matches of the midweek, they await us, Noobites!  We get a spicy mix of league and Cup matches, a Premier League team gets a new name, I scare my volunteer with a thinly-veiled maiming threat, and so much more..

NEW FEATURE:  Staff seer Noobstradamus – who may or may not be merely an alter ego of Noob’s – is challenging The Management and Dan-o “the Interno Inferno” to a contest of prognostication.

We’ll all pick winners and losers for all games except Monday’s.  We won’t pick draws, because Amuricuh!   One point is earned for getting a game right, two for picking a big underdog to win in games I’ll designate with a “u”.

Monday, 1/2

  1. Manchester City vs. Watford (u) – English Premier League

The City train just keeps rolling, seemingly unstoppable.   Noob’s Tracking them because there’s talk about this being a Greatest Ever-sort of team.  And they won’t be sleeping on 10th-place Watford, since they don’t have another League match for two weeks.

RESULT:   Man City   3-1

Image result for watford fc crest

 

Watford, your crest still looks like an upside-down PSA for reminding people to use a licensed doctor for vaginoplasty.

B.  Napoli vs. Atalanta (u) – Coppa Italia

Number B.!  Italy’s FA Cup has reached its Quarterfinals.

League #1 Napoli plays host.   They’ve won four matches in a row.  #9 Atalanta has been rolling for a while, but got ambushed at home by lowly Cagliari in their last match.  The winner will get league #2 Juventus in all likelihood.

RESULYT:   Atalanta   1-2    Noobstradamus succcess!  Not that, you know, I’m surprised or anything  *cough*

Image result for noobstradamus

 

Napoli is in a dogfight for the league lead.  They will let their focus slip today.  Atalanta shall win.  Noobstradamus has bespoken!

Bespake.  Bespeaked?    Blaargh.

 

  1. Iraq vs. U.A.E. – Arabian Gulf Cup

Reminder:  Seven Gulf area teams, plus Yemen.  These two both rate in the 70’s in FIFA rankings, should be the higher-quality of the Semifinals.

Iraq looks like the class of the field.  U.A.E. somehow finished 2nd in their Group scoring only one goal in the three games.  (They gave up none.)  The winner likely gets Oman in the Final.

RESULT:   U.A.E.   0-0  /  2-4  pk      The Emirates’ shutout streak continues.  On to the Final to face Oman.

Tuesday, 1/3

  1. Arsenal vs. Chelsea – English Premier League

This should be the match of the midweek!  Neither club has lost since early last month.

Chelsea is in 3rd.  Arsenal stands at 5th place, a guaranteed 2018 Europa League slot.  They’re well behind 4th-place Liverpool, but could use some space against hated rival and all-around scorned 6th-place Tottenham.

New Year’s resolution!   Noob will now regularly refer to accursed, named-for-a-traitor Tottenham more regularly as “Tottenham  Sir Topham Hatt Hotspur”.

RESULT:   2-2

Image result for sir topham hatt thomas the tank engine

 

He’s a much more palatable figure than dastardly Henry “Hotspur” Percy.

 

 

Hello, Noobites- The Management here.  The Management would like to apologize for Noob’s incessant ranting on this topic.  He’s had his head med upped recently, but the hoped-for effect can take weeks to show up.  Thank you for your time and patience. – The Management.

Hey, The Management.  Noob doesn’t remember signing away his HIPAA privacy rights.  But let’s move on.

  1. Sydney FC vs. Newcastle Jets – Australian A-League

#1 vs. #2!   Noob’s always down for it.   Even if barely more than a dozen games into the league season Sydney is up eight points on Newcastle, who are in turn up seven on 3rd place.

These are the only two finishing positions that are AFC Champions League slots.  Sydney leads the league in scoring and defense.

RESULT:   2-2      Sydney salvages a point with a goal in the 87′

  1. Formentera (u) vs. Alavés – Copa del Rey (Spain FA Cup)

This is the Round of 16.  Unlike with many FA Cups, teams here play two-legged ties (two-match series).

Formentera is our pececillo – Minnow.   They’re a so-so third-tier team that have made it a long way.   Their guests are a poor La Liga team, and they’ve already beaten much better Atletico Bilbao.  Noob’s got a thing for island teams, and Formentera are based in the Balearics.  Gofightwin!

RESULT:   Alavés   1-3

Image result for formentera

 

Someday Noob’s ashes will be scattered in that lagoon.  Heaven.

  1. Juventus vs. Torino (u) – Coppa Italia

This is not the Quarterfinal matchup league 10th-place Torino was hoping for.  They’re defense is pretty suspect, and Juventus are the goal-scoring monster of Serie A.

  1. Benfica vs. Sporting CP – Primeira Liga

Porto leads Portugal’s top league, but Sporting Lisbon is tied with them.  Benfica is close behind in 3rd.  This league only gets to Champions League spots this year.  Torcida importante!

RESULT:   Juve   2-0

        Um, Mr. Noob, sir?   I don’t mean to interrupt.

Yet here you are, doing just that, Dan-o the Intern-o Inferno.

        Are you trying to write “important match” in Portuguese?  

I’m not “trying”.  I did.

        Er, that’s actually “important candle-wick”.

I once took a man’s eyeball out with a mellonballer.

        Right.  Carry on!

  1. Apollon Limassol vs. AEK Limassol – Cypriot First Division

The battle for Cyprus’ second-largest city is ON.  Intracity rivalries reign supreme for Noob!

3rd hosts 5th place here.  The top six will have a postseason tournament for the league title and Champions League berth.   Apollon are the best team in the league and are undefeated.  They’ve played three fewer league games than the others because of their international competition play.

RESULT:   1-1

Wednesday, 1/4

  1. Tottenham   Sir Topham Hatt Hotpsur vs. West Ham United (u) – English Premier League

Sir Topham Hatt is in 6th place.   Feels good to use the new moniker in a sentence.  Not that Noob’s bile and vitriol for the Traitorous Ones will ever diminish!   But it is nicer.

West Ham suck out loud and need to knock that crap off, get the big upset here.

RESULT:   1-1

Image result for misplaced anger funny

Prognistication Challenge

Noobstradamus:   Man City, Atalanta, Iraq, Arsenal, Sydney,  Formentera, Juventus, Benfica, Apollon, West Ham

The Management:   Watford, Atalanta, Iraq, Chelsea, Newcastle, Alavés, Torino, Benfica, AEK Limassol, West Ham

Dan the Interno Inferno:   Man City, Atalanta, I-Rock (the name is sheer bravado), Arsenal, Alaves, Sydney (“the thunder from down under”)*, Apollon, Torino, Benfica,  “I -Tottenham- some good learnins’ so they’d better score some of them goals -Hotspur-“.

*Noob points out the intern unintentional comedy:   1)  “thunder from down under” could, of course, refer to either or any Australian team, and B) would be less likely to refer to Sydney FC since they are nicknamed the “Sky Blues”.   🙂   (Now watch him win.)

’10 to Track’ – Relegation Monday starts 2018

Glory be!  Noob starts off the new year with with our Monday tradition – celebrating and getting to know teams that are performing so poorly, their leagues will soon give them the heave-ho.

As always, we start off with a few non-Relegation games of import:

  1. Cerezo Osaka vs. Yokohama F. Marinos – Emperor’s Cup (Japan)

RESULT:   Cerezo Osaka 2-1  aet      Congratulations to the cherry blossoms!  Getting the hardware in extra time.

The Final!  Japan’s top league Cup comes down to a one-off between the league’s 3rd and 5th place teams.   Cerezo is better on both sides of the ball, but that just points out tough and gritty Yokohama was winning close games all season.

This game gets held at neutral site Saitama, host city for Noob-fave Urawa Red Diamonds.

Image result for the situation abs

 

“Jersey Shore” star The Situation here.  I may be glorifying my abs, but I’m crying on the inside.  

They can’t have a game in Tokyo’s version of Jersey and not have Urawa playing.  They just can’t.

 

B.  Derby County vs. Sheffield United – English Championship League

RESULT:   1-1      Derby remain in 2nd, Sheffield Utd. slip to 7th

Primo second-tier matchup.   Derby County is in 2nd, one of two in position to be promoted to Premier League automatically at season’s end.  But two teams lurk a just a point behind.

3rd through 6th-place sides qualify for a playoff to determine what third team gets moved up.  Sheffield Utd. are in a dead heat for that last spot right now.

  1. USMM Hadjout vs. RC Oued Rhiou – Algerian FA Cup

A really bad tier-three team hit the road to take on a club Noob thinks is at the same level.   So, get ready to rock out with your Hadjout, Noobites.

RESULT:   Oued Rhiou 1-2      The Fighting Scrabble Vowel-Dumps move on to the round of 32!

Image result for hadj

 

Is someone gonna get on that stage and rock “Freebird”?

  1. Bolton Wanderers vs. Hull City – English Championship League

RESULT:   Bolton   1-0      Wanderers climb out of the Drop Zone

Bolton, are you about to stop sucking?  Three teams will get dropped from this league, and the Wanderers are in that group – but barely.  They’re only behind Sunderland on goal differential, who are above the line.  And this game is winnable, as Hull City is only in 19th.

Fun Fact:   Bolton were also known as “the Trotters”.  One argued derivation is that players used to have to trot through pigpens at their old field when the ball went out of bounds.

  1. Scunthorpe United vs. Bury – League One

RESULT:   Scunthorpe   1-0

Bury is in last place in England’s this tier-league.  And since four clubs will get Dropped into League two, things look dark for them.  A road game at #4 Scunthorpe isn’t going to help them start the new year off right.

Less-than-Fun Fact:  The town Bury used to be known for tripe, the stomachs of farm animals.  As food.  Maybe this is arbitrary of Noob, since we eat other aminal parts, but that’s awful.

Image result for tripe

 

Is this what that Will Smith movie was about?

  1. Ballinamallard United vs. Crusaders – Northern Ireland Premier

RESULT:   Crusaders   0-3

Only one team from this league gets automatically Relegated, and it’s Ballinmallard by a landslide right now.  Crusaders are #2 in the league, just two points out of 1st and the only Champions League berth to be had here.

Fun Fact:  Ballinamallard the village is only an eighth the size of the very close-by town of Ennniskillen.  Despite this, the town’s football club doesn’t appear to be even in the top four levels of Northern Ireland’s pyramid.

  1. Aberystwyth Town vs. Carmarthen Town – Welsh Premier League

RESULT:   Carmarthen   1-2      More Relegation Monday suckcess!  Though they’re still in last

Two teams will get Relegated to one of two lower leagues after this season.  Carmarthen has only half as many wins as the second-to-last club.  Still, if they have any chance of a road win this year, it’s this match.  Aberystwyth is only in 8th.

Fun Fact:  Carmarthen translates to “Merlin’s fort”.  Arthurian legend arguably puts Merlin’s birthplace just outside this town.

Image result for Merlin fort carmarthen

 

“You shall not pass… to that body shop!!”

(Noob’s mixing his wizards and does not care.)

  1. Bnei Sakhnin vs. Maccabi Tel Aviv – Israeli Premier

RESULT:   MTA   0-1

The bottom eight of the 14 teams in this league will play in a Relegation-avoidance tournament at season’s end.  Sakhnin is in 8th, yet they’re too many points down to have a real chance at climbing into the top six.  And they just can’t score.  MTA are in 4th.

Fun Fact:  Sakhnin is the most successful Arab Israeli team in history.

  1. Mwadui vs. Ruvu Shooting – Tanzania Premier

RESULT:   Mwadui   2-1      The winners climb all the way to 9th! 

14th hosts 13th here.  Either of these sides could end up getting the Boot.

  1. Five Islands vs. Empire – Antigua and Barbuda Premier

RESULT:   2-2      Turns out this was played on 12/30

Here, 1st hosts last place.  Empire is one of what look like seven teams that play at the same stadium in St. John’s.

Image result for empire football antigua and barbuda

 

 

Empire Football- the ones with bowling shoes.

’10 to Track’ for wknd 12/30-31 – a double dose of Premier League

The weekend – when 10 to Track gets serious on the league action.  The most important matches of the weekend await us, newish American soccer fans!  Let’s finish 2017 strong, and even with a nostalgia-link at the end.

Saturday, 12/30

  1. Liverpool vs. Leicester City – English Premier League

The EPL sends four teams to Champions League next season.  The two Manchester clubs and Chelsea are going to be there.  The most serious question regards that fourth slot.  Liverpool hold it now, but Burnley and accursed Tottenham are breathing down their necks.

Leicester, meanwhile, sits in 8th.  And a they’re a far cry from 7th, the lowest position in the table that might get a Europa League berth.  They haven’t won in their last three league matches.  The home draw against Man Utd. was solid enough, but the preceding loss to Crystal Palace was putrid.

RESULT:   Liverpool   2-1     They remain in 4th and 8th.  Liverpool gets some breathing room from Tottenham though.

B.  Bristol City vs. Wolverhampton Wanderers – English Championship League

Since scouting this game a few days ago, Bristol have moved up from 4th into a tie for 2nd.  Since Wolverhampton are dominantly in 1st place, we’re treated to the sweetest of matchups!

The top two from ECL are automatically promoted to Premier League at season’s end.  Wolverhampton’s built themselves a nice cushion in the table.  They score more and give up fewer goals than all other league teams.  Meanwhile, Bristol’s in a dogfight for that second slot.

RESULT:   Wolverhampton   1-2

Image result for wolverhampton funny

 

 

Hold on, is Billy Zane at least still doing the Georgia Gold commercials?

  1. Inter Milan vs. Lazio – Serie A

Things are tight at the top of this league’s standings.  Lazio still holds the top spot, having lost only once all season.

3rd-place Inter’s lost their last two league matches, plus their Coppa match to AC Milan.  If “the Big Grass Snake” want to stay in the top four and qualify for Champions League next year, they’ve got to start finding the back of the net again.

RESULT:   0-0

  1. Celtic vs. Rangers – Scottish Premiership

Celtic are doing Celtic things again this year.  Score the most, give up the fewest goals.  One loss.  Eight-point lead in the table.  Even with the second-best offense in the league, this may not be close for 3rd-place Rangers.

RESULT:   0-0

Image result for celtic women funny

 

I re-watched your entire series two years ago!  Doesn’t that earn Noob some pants-leeway?

  1. Motagua vs. Real España – Honduras National League

The Apertura Final!   Real topped Motagua 2-0 in the first leg of this postseason championship tournament.  These teams were 2nd and 4th in the league regular season, but nearly identical statistically.  Two goals are a big deficit to overcome in this setting, even at home.

RESULT:   2-1  (aet)    But Real España is the champion!  After 90 minutes, it was Motagua 2-0.  Since that only tied the score on aggregate, they played extra time, where Real scored the only goal.

  1. Caldas vs. Académica – Portugal FA Cup

This is the last match in the Round of 16 for the Taça de Liga.  And we get treated to a Minnow Watch!

Caldas is a middling team from third-tier Campeonato de Portugal.   They’re matched up against a very successful second-tier side in Académica.  Should Caldas win, a Campeonato team will be guaranteed to make the Semifinals.  Fellow league side Farense will get the winner of this match in the Quarters.

RESULT:   Caldas   1-1  /  4-2  pk

Image result for caldas sc 2017 crest

 

 

All those tiny little castles.  Looks like a Lego set.

  1. Feirense vs. Oliveirense – Portugal League Cup

This is not the same event as above.  This, the Taça de Liga, only includes teams from the top two leagues in the nation.  Only the top team from each Group of four in this event will advance.

LigaPro (second-tier) Oliveirense are tied for 1st  in their Group, but they hold the goal differential-tiebreaker.  Win and they’re probably in the Semis.   Stunning, given that they’re having an awful year in their league.   The Primera hosts here need to win big and get some help from another match result.

RESULT:   2-2    And so Oliveirense advance!

Image result for you need help funny

  1. Al Ahly vs. Atletico Madrid – international friendly

Egyptian and Spanish giants face off in a charity match, with the proceeds going to the families of Egyptians killed by terrorist acts.  It’s hard to imagine either team using starters for very long, but “peace against terrorism” as a theme makes this a worthwhile Track for Noob.

RESULT:   Ateltico   2-3

Image result for coming off the bench funny soccer

 

 

…for the cause of peace against terrorism.

 

 

Sunday, 12/31

  1. West Bromwich Albion vs. Arsenal – English Premier League

Arsenal is all the way up to a tie for 5th after a poor start to the season, haven’t lost since 12/2.  But only the top four will get into next season’s Champions League.

West Brom have as few losses as 10th-place Watford, yet are in 19th.  Soooo many draws.  They have trouble scoring, but hosting makes this intriguing.  Arsenal don’t play nearly the defense as other clubs near the top of the table.

RESULT:   1-1  

  1. Grenades vs. Parham – Antigua and Barbuda Premier

3rd hosts 2nd place in a paradise.  Here’s what you need to know about Parham FC.  Ah, sweet revisiting of a classic D-Twosday Interview.

RESULT:   Parham   0-1

http://www.soccernoob.com/2017/11/07/d-two-sday-interview-judge-margo-k-brodie-nasl-ruling/

’10 to Track’ for Globetrotting Friday, 12/29 – from Scottish Championship to Syria

TGIGF – Globetrotting Friday descends upon us!  Most days, T2T brings us the “ten most important games” for us, the newish American soccer fans.

Fridays, we take advantage of “big” leagues’ lighter scheds and span the globe!  It’s all first class travel as you and Noob jetset.  Have a complementary mimosa. (We’ll finish with one, too, you’ll see.)

First, we start off with locales somewhat more featured here:

  1. Belenenses vs. Sporting CP – Portugal League Cup

There are two Cup tournaments going on in Portugal right now.   This one – the Taça de Liga – is just for the top two leagues in the country.  The other one – the Taça de Portugal – involves more leagues, is the FA Cup.

This is the last game of the Group Stage for these two.   Only the winner from each Group advances.  Sporting is 1st in this Group of four, only really need a draw to advance.   Belenenses is tied for 2nd with Maritimo.  They must win and outpace Maritimo on goal differential should they also win.

All this said, the hosts would be doing well to even lose by one to league 2nd-place Sporting.

RESULT:   1-1      Sporting advances to the next round.

B.  Iraq vs. Yemen – Arabian Gulf Cup

Reminder:  Eight Gulf area teams, plus Yemen.  Two Groups of four, out of which top two teams advance form the Group Stage.

The teams in this Group have just one game left each.  Iraq is tied with Bahrain for 1st.  With a win or draw, they advance.   Yemen sucks.

RESULT:   Iraq 3-0     and on to the Semis

Image result for Yemen funny

 

Eeeeeeasy, Yemen.   No need to get crazy.

  1. Paykan vs. Pars Jonoubi Jam – Persian Gulf Pro League (Iran)

As yesterday, we have another match featuring a Noob-Adopted team.  Welcome back, Jonoubi Jaaayum!

Three teams from this league qualify for the AFC Champions League next year.  Here, 4th hosts 2nd.  If the hosts control the pace, this will be a low-scoring game.  PJJB plays more wide open.

RESULT:   1-1

  1. Al Nassr vs. Al Ahli – Saudi Pro League

Noob’s also referred to this as “Saudi Premier”.  I think this change is accurate.

3rd hosts 1st place here.  Al Ahli scores like it’s going out of style.  Al Nassr is good, but probably give up too many goals to hang season-long in the top three and get a C.L. berth.

RESULT:   Al Nassr   3-1

Image result for al-nassr fc

 

Oh, you wanna dance, Al-Nassr player-guy?!   Let fisticuffs ensue!

  1. St. Mirren vs. Dundee United – Scottish Championship

This might be the first time Noob’s featured a second-tier Scottish match.  Hooray!   We always have room for 1st vs 2nd place.

This is another match where pace-control will determine the winner.  St. Mirren score so much, Noob wonders if they even play a goalie.  Dundee sport the league’s best defense.  And only one team gets promoted to Premier level at season’s end.

RESULT:   St. Mirren   2-0

And now, Noobites, we head off for soccer sites never seen!  OK, occasionally seen.  

  1. Montego Bay United vs. Cavalier – Jamaica Premier

The top six of the twelve make the postseason league playoffs.  These two are in 8th and 5th, respectively.

Fun fact:  Seba United (now Montego Bay Utd.) once won the league championship despite have been docked -20- points.

RESULT:   Cavalier   0-1     and apparently it was mislisted or changed, was played the day before

Image result for montego bay united

  1. Al Taliya vs. Al Ittihad – Syria Premier

This league only sends one to the AFC Champions League next season.  These two are in 4th and 3rd place, but all the teams at the top of the table are close together.  Ittihad only gives up a goal every other game on average.

Fun, Confusing Fact:  Al Taliya are the “Hama Hurricane”.  They’re based in Hama.  The other part is more confusing.

RESULT:   Al Ittihad   0-1

  1. Azam vs. Ndanda – Tanzania Premier

2nd hosts 11th place.

Fun facts:  Azam is one of three major clubs in Dar es Salaam, the largest city in east Africa.  Musiki da wansi is the most traditional style of live music from there.  Enjoy some DDC Mlimani Park Orchestra during your time here with Noob on T2T.

RESULT:    ppd

  1. ESB Besbès vs. US Souf – Algeria Cup

All Noob can tell you about these teams is they’re far enough down the Algerian football pyramid that finding which amateur leagues and levels they’re at eluded Noob’s quick Google efforts.

Perhaps we can get Dan-o “the Intern-o Inferno” to do a deeper dive.

RESULT:   Besbès   1-1   (aet)  /  4-3  pk     So after regulation time it was 0-0.  The both scored once in extra time, then settled it with penalty kicks.

Image result for sleeping on the job

 

When you’re done typing “^OT^UGGOGOU”, perhaps we could talk footyball research?

  1. ASEC Mimosas vs. Sporting Gagnoa – Ivory Coast Ligue 1

For those who would prefer “Côte d’Ivoire”, cram it down your French pastryholes!   Muahahaha.  At least Noob is using “Ligue”.

We finish Friday’s Globetrotting strong, with a 1st vs. 3rd-matchup.  This league will send two side to next year’s CAF Champions League.

Fun facts:   ASEC Mimosas are the defending league champs.  They are named after the plant, not the alcoholic beverage.

RESULT:   Mimosas   3-2

Image result for pastry eating funny

 

Noob said, “Cram it!”

And get a real hat.  

’10 to Track’ for T-R, 12/26-28 – your extra helping of Coppa Italia

One needs no gift receipt when it’s the ten most important soccer games for us, the newish American fans.  Size ten fits all Noobites perfectly.

Noob’s continuing the holiday season format, combining three days into one satisfying T2T.

Tuesday, 12/26

  1. Manchester United vs. Burnley – English Premier

Man Utd now trails their crosstown City rivals by a staggering 13 points in the table.   They can handle 7th-place Burnley at home – if they can score.  That’s always the issue facing Burnley, who don’t score and let others score even less.

RESULT:   2-2

Image result for Burnley meme

 

 

Cartoon memes sting worst, because of the lack of fingers.

B.  Anderlecht vs. Gent – Belgium First Division A

3rd faces 4th place here.   It’s surprising Gent isn’t ahead of them, as they’re much better defensively.

In fact, Noobstradamus has had a surreal vision!   I was gorging on a sequoia-sized la buche de noel in my dream-roofless house.  On the tv, St. Nicholas and Pere Noel were engaged in a vicious cage match.  Old Nick was cursing wildly in Walloon and smashing his foe with a tinsel-bestrewn folding chair.

Just as my sugar rush was hitting its peak, the tv ticker scrolled that Anderlecht football was overrated.  I knew then then that Gent would prevail.  Road upset, 1-2.

RESULT:   Anderlecht   1-0     Noobstradamus blames the fungal dessert.

Image result for la buche de noel

 

The ‘shrooms are an odd touch.  Unless they’re hallucinogenic.

  1. Lazio vs. Fiorentina – Coppa Italia

Italy’s FA Cup has reached its Quarterfinals, and this is a truly intriguing match.

Lazio is in 5th place in Serie A, just outside the berths for next year’s Champions League.  Will be they be focused on the Coppa. Using all their starters?   8th-place Fiorentina will, and they haven’t lost in a month and a half.  Noobstradamus is calling this one in favor of Florence’s Lillies, 0-1.

RESULT:   Lazio   1-0       The NORAD tracking Santa screwed up my prognostication reception.

Image result for noobstradamus

 

 

I spy -with my Forrest Whitaker eye – an upset!

  1. Crusaders vs. Cliftonville – Northern Ireland Premier

Crusaders are tied for 2nd place, but only one team from this league qualifies for Champions League. Cliftonville has slipped to 5th.  Crusaders score an astounding three goals per game, so this should be an entertaining one.

RESULT:    Crusaders   2-0

  1. Iraq vs. Qatar – Arabian Gulf Cup

In this tournament, the eight teams are divided into two Groups of four.  The teams in each Group will only play each other once in this Stage.  The top two in each Group will advance.

And Qatar won their first game, so that’s HYOOJ.  Iraq, which on paper is the better team, earned a tie in theirs.

RESULT:   Iraq   1-0       Iraq and Bahrain are tied atop the Group with a game to go.  Qatar is a point behind them in the table.

Wednesday, 12/27

  1. AC Milan vs. Inter Milan – Coppa Italia

AC Milan is struggling mightily in Serie A this season, in 11th.  Internazionale is up in 3rd.  Noob will be very curious to see if home pitch advantage means just a little or a whole lot when it’s an intracity rivalry.  Quarterfinal match.

RESULT:   AC Milan   1-0  (AET)

Image result for AC Milan meme

 

 

Fake news.  We knew it had to be happening somewhere.

 

 

 

Thursday, 12/28

  1. Saudi Arabia vs. Oman – Arabian Gulf Cup

The teams in this Group have already played two matches each, so this is the last one.

Saudi Arabia and U.A.E. each have four points.  Oman trails them by a point, so they need to win, hope U.A.E. doesn’t beat host country Kuwait’s team.  Which they will.  But still.

RESULT:   Oman   0-1    Upset in Kuwait, and the Omani are through to the next round!   The Saudis are out.

  1. Difaa Al Jadida vs. Hassania Agadir – Morocco Botola Pro

They’re a dozen games or so into this league season, and only two teams are truly out of it.  These two are 4th and 1st place, respectively.  El Jadida are bit slack on the defensive side of the ball.  It’s hard to call #1 winning an upset, but this would be a big road win for Agadir.

RESULT:   El Jadida   1-0

Image result for Morocco football meme

 

Ehhhhverybody thinks Noob is mentally unsettled.

But I don’t make these things.  Just find ’em.

  1. US Monastir vs. CS Sfaxien – Tunisia Ligue 1

Sfaxien is the only team with a realistic chance of catching #1 Esperance, five points behind them.  Monastir is one of two teams five points farther back.  If they want to move up, they’ll likely have to up their goal-scoring a notch.

RESULT:   Monastir   1-0        This one was actually played yesterday.

  1. Jamshedpur vs. Chennaiyin – Indian Super League

It’s been a bit since Noob’s featured Indian football, so a quick note.  There are two “level one” leagues in India, this one and the I-League.  This one does not do promotion/relegation.  It is formed on a more “franchise mode”, much like the U.S. and Australia.

Noob is Adopting Jamshedpur as his own!  They – like all teams with “jam” in the name – will be part of the Noob fave-family.   Jaaaayyyyyyum!

But wow do they not seem exciting to watch live.  In six games, they’ve scored twice and allowed one goal.  They’re in 6th.   Channaiyin are #1.

Chennaiyin   0-1

Image result for hot damn this is my jam