Tag: Bangor City

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Globetrotting Friday (4/20) – MLS, NWSL, Liga MX keep us closer to home

TGIGF!  yet today, we won’t be hitting the soccer hinterlands quite like usual.  This is a rare Friday sched that’s chock full of great matches, in leagues Noob covers and you crave.

  1. Sporting Kansas City vs. Vancouver Whitecaps – MLS

Nearly every team has played five games, an arbitrary benchmark Noob uses to stop leaning on the previous seasons’ stats so heavily and look at what’s in front of us.

So what’s in front of us?  KC is #1 in the West, and they’re doing it with a wide-open style.  They lead the league in offense.  Vancouver is in 3rd.  They’re two road wins this early are impressive.  But ultimately, this team isn’t scoring enough goals.  Bad matchup for them today.

Noob’s thinking KC 3-0.  The Management should be pleased, since he is pro-all things KC.   (9:00 PM Eastern, NBA League Pass)

RESULT:   KC   6-0

Image result for happy Manager funny

 

Where were you hiding that cake, The Management?

Noob likes chocolate cake.  Noob will root for KC.

B.  Washington Spirit vs. Portland Thorns – NWSL

In 2 Corinthians, Paul writes of a thorn in his flesh.  Three times he prayed for its removal.  Each time, the Lord told him His grace would be sufficient instead.

Noob’s not quite sure how this can fit here, but I will say Washington needs to pray here.  The Capitol gals finished in last in 2017.  Just three games in this year they are better.  But they aren’t playing any defense, and that’s not going to bode well against the defending champs.

RESULT   1-1

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Number B,. any chance that Holy Spirit-dove is Washington’s mascot?

  1. Puebla vs. CF America – Liga MX

Two matches two go in the Clausura (second half-season).  America sit in 3rd, and are all but mathematically guaranteed a Liguilla slot, top-eight finish.

Puebla are in 13th – not out, but on life support.  Their GD isn’t all that bad, but their guests today are tied for the best defense in the league.   Must win for “The Sweet Potatoers”.     (8:00 PM, Univision Deportes)

RESULT:   Puebla   3-1      Puebla pulls into a three-way tie for 9th, just a point behind the two teams tied for 8th

  1. Dijon vs. Lyon – Ligue 1

France’s slip in the UEFA rankings this year means they only get three Champions League invites now.  This has Lyon sweating bullets.  They’re tied for 3rd with Marseille.  Dijon shouldn’t present a problem today, except that the game is there.  One never knows what the road may bring.    (3:00 PM, beIN Sports)

RESULT:   Lyon   2-5

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Lies!  Clearly there is a problem related to mustard.

  1. Connah’s Quay vs. T.N.S. – Welsh Premier

It’s #B vs. #1!   That’s always eye-catching for Noob, even if The New Saints have already claimed the league title.  TNS score close to twice as much as anyone else, but will they be motivated now?

CQ are in position to get the only automatic Europa League berth here, but only lead Bangor City by three in the table.

RESULT:   TNS   1-3

  1. Millwall vs. Fulham – English Championship League

This may only be second-tier football, but this league has ranked as high as 14th before in the overall UEFA rankings.  And this match should be a doozy.

Millwall are in 6th, with competition hot on their heels for that last spot in the Promotion Playoffs.  Fulham are in 3rd and guaranteed at least a PP spot already.  But they’re also only a point behind #B Cardiff City.  If they can pass them, they’ll be automatically moved up to Premier League.

RESULT:   Fulham   0-3     Fulham climb to #B by two points, though one must note they’ve played two more matches than #3 Cardiff.  

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“Hot on their heels”.  English Sexy Pointed Toe Shoes.

Not bad, Dan the Intern-o Inferno.  But find some better ankles next time.

  1. Braga vs. Maritimo – Primeira Liga

Portugal’s is the highest-ranked league (#7) to only get two Champions League slots.  This means Braga has work to do.  They’re in 4th, six points behind #B Benfica.  Maritimo are tied for 5th, but they’re merely playing to be the best of the rest.  Big gap between the top four and all others here.

RESULT:   Braga   2-0     Braga move into a tie for 3rd.  They’ve played one more match than Sporting CP with whom they’re tied though.

  1. Istanbul Basaksehir vs. Kayserispor – Turkey Super Lig

A reminder:  This is a top 10 league in Europe.  We pay attention.

Galatasaray – 60, Besiktas 59, Istanbul 59.  Fenerbahce 57.  Say hello to the most dramatic league finish coming.  Five matches remain for everyone.  Just two will make CL.

I.B. are better on both sides of the ball than the #6 visitors today, should take care of business.  Kayser aren’t playing for any Euro-postseason.

RESULT:   Istanbul   3-1   I.B. move into 1st.  They’ve played one more match than the teams right behind them though.

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Um, Dan the Intern-o Inferno?  Turkey Super Lig.  LIG.

Cute though.

  1. Reims vs. AC Ajaccio – Ligue 2

Congrats, Ligue 2!  Noob had a Paraguayan game scouted for this slot today, but Independiente fell out of the top quarter of their league.  Denied!

France’s second division automatically promotes two to Ligue 1 annually.  Reims are #1 and they’re unlikely to be caught now.  ACA are #3.  That’s good to make the league’s Promotion Playoffs, but they’re also just a point behind #B Nimes.

RESULT:   Reims   1-0

  1. Melbourne City vs. Brisbane Roar – Australia A-League

More denial!  Noob had an Algerian Ligue 1 match all lined up, but Hussein Day fell off the radar like Independiente.

Instead, we finish our globetrotting Down Under.  It’s the Playoffs!  The top two regular season finishers are getting byes.  Four more face off in Knockout matches to see who plays the league leaders.

Melbourne City finished third, Brisbane 6th.  Noob has confirmed that the Playoff champions – not the regular season champion – gets an Asian Champions League invite.  While not confirmed, Noob assumes the loser of the Playoff final will get the other invite.

RESULT:   Melbourne City   2-0

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Good thing this makes sense.

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Globetrotting Friday! From Liga MX to goodness knows where

TGIGF!   The day of the week where Noob starts with a match or three from more familiar locales, then we jetset off to footyball parts less-heralded!

Noob’s a touch tardy getting today’s T2T posted.  Apologies.  I slept most of 22 straight hours with almost 105 fever.  But I’m on the mend, and so let’s travel!  Noob will ride in the back of the plane while Noobites enjoy first class.   No point risking contagion more than need be.

  1. Morelia vs. Veracruz – Liga MX

Morelia is in 5th.  Veracruz is nearly in last.  Not surprising.  They’ve been in position to be the team that gets Relegated for some time.  But we will cheer them on today, Noobites!

Remember Noob’s maxim– never, ever pull for a team that claims to be royalty.  We have nonesuch in North America, and we like it that way!  Morelia are the Monarcas.   (8:00 PM Eastern, Univision Deportes)

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Oooooh, crap on a cracker.

Noob may have said too much.

B.  Bangor City vs. Bala Town – Welsh Premier

While not quite as dominant as last season, T.N.S. are all but officially the league champs.  What’s left to determine is which team will finish #B and get the automatic Europa League invite, versus several other teams which will play a postseason tournament to decide which gets the other one.

If you ask Noob – and you really shouldn’t, I mean, have you been reading this weirdness for any length of time? – Bangor City will wreck Bala Town.  Based on GD, two-points-back Bala is more like an 8th-place side.  Maybe they win close, are tough and gritty.  But I think 4th-place Connah’s Quay have a better chance of making the move.

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The Welsh alphabet is weird.  but Number B makes everything okay.

  1. Dundalk vs. Cork City – Irish Premier

Ireland’s is a “summer league”, and so just getting started.  These two finished Bth and 3rd respectively last year.

Fun Fact:  The city of Dundalk is tied to the mythological hero Cú Chulainn.  In battle frenzy, he was written to become a monster, attacking friends and enemies alike.

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No, Noob did not add the cute little censoring square.

  1. Nasaf vs. Buxoro – Uzebekistan Superleague

This is one of Asia’s ten best leagues, and they, too, are just getting started.  These two finished #B and #6 last year.  Noobites will be more likely to know league powerhouse Lokomotiv Tashkent.

Fun fact:  Only about 10% of the Region’s (state) population lives in Qarshi, where Nasaf plays.   The vast majority live in rural areas.

  1. Esteghlal Khuzestan vs. Kooneh Be Kooneh – Iran Hazfi (FA) Cup

Persian Minnow Alert!   Not that KBK winning would be an upset of epic proportions.  E.K. is nearish the bottom of the table in the top league, while the visitors are #B in the second tier.  This is a Semfinal, and it’s one match only.

Fun Fact:   Kooneh Be Kooneh is the most delicious coffee in the world.

The Management would like to apologize for Noob’s antics.  Noober, you might be thinking of Kona coffee?  From Hawai’i?   Persian coffee beans isn’t really a big industry.

Kooneh coffee beans are best when roasted young.  They give a hearty flavor, though are not so distinctly bitter as Turkish drinks.

*SIGH*

  1. AmaZulu vs. Ubuntu Cape Town – South Africa Nedbank (FA) Cup

This is South Africa’s FA Cup, and like the English version, they allow lots of teams from many lower levels to compete.  This is a Round of 16 one-off match.  AmaZulu is a midtable premier team, while UCT is last place in the second tier.

Fun Fact:  Ubuntu is the most delicious computer operating system in the world.

The Management would like to… okay, fine.  Well-played.   Asshat.

  1. Masavu vs. Bright Stars – Uganda Super League

Uganda’s top league doesn’t appear to even be in the top 16 in Africa, based admittedly on just one CAF source Noob found.  But we’re going, Noobites!  With our devotion and support, they can… oh bloody hell.   They’re just not good.

Masavu are in the Relegation Zone, looking likely to get dropped down to the Uganda Big League.  They’d be doing well just to get a draw against mid-table Bright Stars.

Fun Fact:  Masavu’s crest looks like an early 80’s southern rock album cover.

Image result for masavu fc

  1. Al Nawair vs. Al Ittihad – Syria Premier

Syria’s is only the #16-ranked league in Asia, so they only get one entry into the AFC Champions League.  Al-Ittihad is tied for #B, and only two points behind Al Jaish.  This could be an entertaining, wide open game to watch if it’s findable on some internet stream.  They can’t defend and score tons respectively.

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Is that a ferris wheel?

  1. Energetik vs. Balkan – Turkmenistan Yokary Liga

Not sure why Noob had a thought on it, but I’m surprised this league is as high as #26 of 46 Asian national premier leagues.  Apologies, Turkmenistan.   The new season is just starting.  These two were #6 and #4 last year.

Fun fact:  According to one Christian subgroup – the Keraites – Jesus’ mother Mary is buried in her namesake town of Mary (Energetik’s home).

  1. Orara Valley vs. Boambee Bombers – Australia FFA Cup

This is the second round of Australia’s F(F)A Cup.  Would we care about teams from Northern New South Wales’ seven leagues any other day of week?  Perhaps not.  But it’s globetrotting Friday!  Both teams received byes into this round, so it’s their first Cup action.

Fun Fact:  This group was founded all the way back in 1884.

Ten to Track (8/11/17)

Around the Western World in 10 Games!   The weekend’s first evening is usually a little light, but here are your still pretty solid matchups —

1. Arsenal vs. Leicester City –  English Premier League

The Premiere is back! I may be Noob, but even I know to get excited.

I started tracking soccer – just a little – two seasons ago, towards the end of Leicester’s championship campaign. I now understand just how much of a breath of fresh air it was, as the league is normally dominated by seven particular teams, and Leicester ain’t one.

B. Atlas vs. America – Liga MX

Amuricuh!

And it’s a matchup of two top half teams from last season’s Clausura (second half! Nooooooooob learningness), this should be the more competitive of the this league’s offerings this date.

3. Stade Rennes vs. Lyon –  Ligue 1

Lyon just missed out on making this year’s UEFA Champion’s League last season, finishing 4th. Stade Rennes was a top half club.

4. Edmonton vs. NY Cosmos – North American Soccer League

NASL is the much smaller Tier Two League, compared to USL, and so their postseason only has four teams. The fabled Cosmos finished third in the leagues Spring Season, and so is in decent position to perhaps finish with one of the two best overall non-division champion records and get in the playoff mix. Edmonton, Canadia should fall to them, even at home.

5. Zulte-Waregem vs. Brugge – Belgian Jupiler League

Last season’s #2 hosts #3.

UEFA ranks’s Belgiums’s top flite league as 8th best on the continent, right behind surprising-to-me-is-this-high Russia and surprisingly-low-to-me Portugal.

6. Ballymena vs. Crusaders – Northern Irish Premiership

Crusaders were the only team to seriously challenge Linfield last season for this group’s Champions League slot. But like Crusaders, Ballymena also got into the Europa League, with a 4th place finish.

7. Bangor City vs. T.N.S. – Welsh Premier

The New Saints lapped the field last season, though have already lost in the early stages of the 2017-18 Champions League. Bangor City finished 4th and achieved a Europa League slot.

8. America de Cali vs. Deportivo Cali – Copa Colombia

The battle for Santiago de Cali is on! This semifinal FA Cup match is the second of the two-legged tie. Deportivo leads 1-0 on aggregate.

9. FCI Tallinn vs. Levadia Tallinn – Estonian Meistriliiga

This league’s top four teams are all from Tallinn. This matchup features #3 and #4.

10. Maribor vs. Donzale – Slovenian Prva Liga

Maribor is the superpower of this league, should handle last season’s #4 squad easily.