Relegation Archives - Soccernoob

Isle of Sodor Premier League – final matchday results (38) – the champs get formally crowned, last minute Relegation mayhem

Fin. Europe’s newest Premier League has completed its inaugural season. Isle of Sodor aren’t in FIFA. No clubs here qualify for anything internationally. No giant piles of money are awarded. Blessedly, it’s just been high-scoring, fun footy.

Image result for train trophy Keep watching this space in the coming weeks. While Noob’s site audience has been limited in reach, the Sudric FA seems content with growing their international exposure at whatever pace comes naturally. So I have been given the option to continue exclusive coverage, which would continue with the summer’s second annual IoS FA Cup. Or Noob may just continue living here, but work on unrelated novel and screenwriting projects already underway. Time will tell.

Here are the Matchday 38 results. And here’s your weekly smexy Table link.

Sunday, 5/26 – 1:00 PM UTC
#1 Dryaw 4 vs. 5 #11 Marron
#14 Castle Rolf 5 vs. 3 #6 Crovan’s Gate
#12 Lakeside 6 vs. 8 #18 Ulfstead
#19 Tidmouth City 9 vs. 1 #8 Wellsworth
#20 Arlesburgh Utd. 2 vs. 8 #7 East Coast Diesel

Sun., 5/25 – 4:00 PM UTC
#13 Vicarstown 3 vs. 3 #15 Brendam Harbor
#5 Junction & Sheds 1 vs. 0 #16 Ffarquhar
T9 Suddery 3 vs. 2 #17 Brendam Utd.
#4 Kirk Ronan 4 vs. 5 #3 Knapford Town
T9 Glennock 5 vs. 5 #2 Peel Godred

Matchday 38 in Highlights

* Relegation madness til the bitter end! Ulfstead won the shootiest shootout of the day, 6-8 at Lakeside. Coupled with Brendam United's 2-3 loss at Suddery, this means U.F.C. climb over B-Utd, sending the latter into 18th and down into next season's Championship.

* With their sixth straight win, Marron secure the last top-half finish, clawing their way over Glennock.

* The season finishes with ties at both 2nd and 4th place. (no goal differential or other tiebreakers in Sudric soccer)

* One more special highlight for champions Dryaw F.C. at the bottom of this final 2018-19 IoS PL post

Feature Match recap: Ulfstead win match, earn Relegation reprieve

Image result for Norramby crest Gotta call this one like it was. Ulfstead‘s 6-8 win over Lakeside looked closer than it really was. Lakeside had a three-match win streak on their side, but Ulfstead had motivation — trying to make the Premier League for 2019-20.

Image result for Lakeside FC crest They also had revenge on their minds, having lost at home by an embarrassing 0-8 margin in the season’s first matchup with “The Quarrysiders“. This one was 0-4 at the half, and went to 1-7 by 70′. Lakeside‘s reserves got some goals against Ulfstead‘s bench late, made the margin respectable.

Coming into this final Matchday, U.F.C. trailed Brendam United by a point for 17th place. Bottom three of the PL‘s 20 get Relegated to the Championship, so one might’ve thought they’d be tight at the outset. But no, everyone was loose. And Noob means everyone. Seven starters scored for Ulfstead!

Ulfstead played one of the early matches, so their survival would depend on the late Suddery–Brendam Utd. match result. Lakeside A.F.C. officials were wonderful sports, extending an invite for everyone to stay and listen to that match’s radio broadcast over the grounds sound system. Players and fans from both clubs intermingled throughout the stands . The concessions folks stayed late. Lakeside folks congratulated U.F.C. on getting above the cutline as Suddery won the dramatic 3-2 barnburner.

Image result for Isle of Sodor flag

THAT is the heart of football on Sodor. Noob can think of no finer note on which to end… except one. 🙂

Congratulations one last time to 2018-19 IoS PL champions Dryaw F.C.! Don’t ask Noob from how it was acquired, but in return for getting to be Sodor FA’s exclusive coverage home, I gifted them what they used for the classiest championship trophy ever.

Image result for BET Soul Train Award trophy

You’re darn tootin’ (pun intended) that’s a BET Soul Train Awards trophy.

Thanks for reading, Noobites.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – matchday 38 preview – the end of 2018-19; though a champion is crowned, so much at stake

Matchday 38. The bittersweet end to the Isle of Sodor’s first-ever Premier League season. The country’s FA-era seems to have gotten off to a bright start.

Image result for train trophy Noob hopes you’ve enjoyed the exclusive coverage found here. Nothing is finalized, but I hope to continue the coverage into the summer’s FA Cup and then beyond into 2019-20 PL season number two. (After all, I did up and move here permanently this spring!)

Oh! And next week we visit the IoS Champions League. It’s nearly time for their Promotion Playoffs!

Here’s the weekend’s full slate. Teams bolded in blue are still in contention for a top-10 finish. Those in red are still trying to avoid the last Relegation slot (18th). Those in purple are still vying for a final top-four position. (Not that it qualifies them for anything, but it has a certain cachet.)

Sun., 5/25 – 1:00 PM UTC
#1 Dryaw vs. #11 Marron
#14 Castle Rolf vs. #6 Crovan’s Gate
#12 Lakeside vs. #18 Ulfstead
#19 Tidmouth City vs. #8 Wellsworth
#20 Arlesburgh Utd. vs. #7 East Coast Diesel

Sun., 5/25 – 4:00 PM, UTC
#13 Vicarstown vs. #15 Brendam Harbor
#5 Junction & Sheds vs. #16 Ffarquhar
T9 Suddery vs. #17 Brendam Utd.
#4 Kirk Ronan vs. #3 Knapford Town
T9 Glennock vs. #2 Peel Godred

Feature Match: #12 Lakeside vs. #18 Ulfstead

Image result for Lakeside FC crest

Hello from Lakeside, Sodor! Was it tempting for Noob to remain in village Dryaw after they clinched the Title last week? Of course. But with the trophy decided, it was time to visit, introduce Noobites to a location new to us.

Lakeside A.F.C. could still finish in a tie for 9th or 10th place. #18 Ulfstead visits, a point out of Relegation safety. More on the match in a bit.

Image result for Sodor map Lakeside is the biggest village in its area in NE-central Sodor. That’s not saying a ton, population-wise. Still, the club there have been slated for Premier League inclusion since the FA first started planning. Most picked them to finish around 16th.

They’ve been able to surpass expectations by not having any other PL competition anywhere close by. The nearby villages of Rheneas and Skarloey have their own Championship-level clubs, but the best around there play for “L.A.F.C.” now.

Image result for blue drawbridge

Village Lakeside has a beautiful blue drawbridge, or bascule bridge at the lake port. The local train line loops the lake and is quite scenic from the high-ledge side. But the bit of local tourism is not the central to the economy there, nor is the lake fishing.

Lakeside’s primary trade comes from its shale quarry. Near to Lakeside proper is Lakeside Junction, a place where several narrow rails come together for shipping it out. Enough residential and business building has developed there that it’s almost its own small village. All but the youngest locals still call the area by its original name though — the odd “Quarry Siding”. And so this is where L.A.F.C. gets it’s unique nickname – the Quarrysiders.

Image result for quarrymen And how have they fared of late? Four wins straight! They’ve finally found their offensive stride in recent matches after a long, slowish start. In fact, two matches ago they walloped Ulfstead on the road 0-8. The last team to defeat them were newly-crowned PL champions Dryaw FC.

Image result for Norramby crest Lakeside trail the teams ahead of them by two and three points. Ulfstead only trail the team ahead of them – Brendam United – by one. This is the more important position. They have to make up that point to avoid a bottom-three finish and getting Relegated to the Championship for next season.

U.F.C. got a nifty win over then-#6 East Coast Diesel 5-2 on Wednesday. That broke a three-loss skid and proved they could still find the back of the net. That had been all but an impossible challenge of late.

Noob’s call: Lakeside may be the more talented team and have a bit more momentum on their side. But Wednesday, Ulfstead proved they’re serious about trying to stay up. Beating a rugged, aggressive, defensive side in E.C.D. is no small feat for any group. Ulfstead will earn a point, creating a possible Relegation Playoff scenario with Brendam Utd. 3-3 today.

Isle of Sodor Premier – early evening Matchday 37 results are in … and a champion is crowned!

updated 11:50 PM ET, 5/23

The celebration is on at Dryaw FC! With just Matchday 38 to play (Sun., 5/26), they now lead Peel Godred FC by four. Here’s a smexy link to the updated table.

Dryaw may not have gotten the full three points, but coupled with PGFC‘s loss, it was enough! The Isle of Sodor has its first ever champion of their new FA era. Noob’s not crying. You’re crying.

Dryaw‘s match-tying E.T. goal deprived Ffarquhar of a season-defining win. Still, the point earned was just enough was to stake FFC a four-point lead over #18 Ulfstead. The last Relegation slot in the table is now a battle just between Ulfstead and #17 Brendam United, who lead them by two.

**The weekend’s “Feature Match” recap is now below the results.**

Here are all the results from Wednesday’s historic day:

Wednesday, 5/22 – 6:00 PM UTC

#1 Dryaw 3 vs. 3 #17 Ffarquhar
#6 Junction & Sheds 4 vs. 2 #15 Brendam Harbor
#20 Arlesburgh Utd. 2 vs. 4 #12 Lakeside
#4 Kirk Ronan 4 vs. 2 T9 Glennock
#13 Vicarstown 4 vs. 3 #2 Peel Godred

Wed., 5/22 – 8:00 PM (UTC)
#19 Tidmouth City 2 vs. 1 #14 Castle Rolf
#17 Brendam Utd. 4 vs. 2 #3 Knapford Town
#5 Crovan’s Gate 4 vs. 8 #11 Marron
#18 Ulfstead 5 vs. 2 #7 E.C.D.
T9 Suddery 6 vs. 6 #8 Wellsworth

Feature Match in Review: Marron stays red hot with SIXTH straight win!

Image result for MFC crest A double brace (six goals) by Marron striker Finlay Creamer led his club to a resounding 4-8 win at then-#5 Crovan’s Gate Wednesday night. The win is Marron‘s straight! They remain in 11th, but are now in position to possibly overtake 10th place on the final Matchday for a top-half finish. CGFC drops to 6th.

The Scottish national and scoring wizard danced through Crovan Gate‘s defense early and often, beginning in the 9’. Creamer had two goals and the team four before CGFC finally broke through for one, just before the half.

Crovan’s Gate improved after the break. In the first half, they simply couldn’t maintain enough possession to employ their trademark whiplash-quick changes of offensive formation. For the second 45, Marron relaxed just a little and the hosts were able to put some things together, pulling as close as 3-5.

But Creamer & Co. were able to push through three more in the last several minutes. CGFC had to bring everyone forward late, which allowed the rout.

Creamer was in a class of his own, scoring in open space from distance with a rocket leg as well from up close. He even notched an assist on a well-lofted corner kick. Marron already knows they need to lock him up. Home calls, and Scottish League Two club Albion Rovers (Coatbridge, North Lanarkshire) have expressed interest in acquiring him. (Hey, when you second-to-last in Scotland’s semi-professional fourth tier of football, you look anywhere.)

The 28 year-old’s masterful performance puts him at 51 goals on the season. (A lot by any stretch, but remember that Sudric football doesn’t focus much in defense. At all.)

"It was something special. I took the ball and then I tried to move forward. In the box it was hard for the defense, since no one likes to touch each other," Creamer told Noob after the match, in what I can only describe as an awkward turn of phrase on his part.

Next up for for Marron is their final match of the season – at #1 Dryaw FC. It’s hard to say how Dryaw will come out, given that they’ve now wrapped up the league title, leaving this one a coronation match of sorts. Marron trail Glennock and Suddery by just a point as they aim for a top-half league finish.

Gate travels to #14 Castle Rolf for their last outing on Sunday. They could retake 5th place from East Coast Diesel, cannot finish lower than 6th where they stand now.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – matchday 36 (5/18-19) In Review – tie for 1st is broken, derbies decided

In the wake of winning the most important match of the season, the scene at the local Joseph Tidy’s in village Dryaw was perhaps the most raucous anyone could remember, ’twas said.

Image result for Doug Barr A dramatic win for their beloved home team. Noob drinking partner, actor/ producer/ vintner Doug Barr of 1980’s TV series “The Fall Guy” leading the patrons in celebratory song, buying shots of Vicarstown raspberry vermouth. Image result for Hollywood and Vine Cellars Everyone excited as he shook hands with Dryaw FC‘s club president over the league’s first-ever stadium naming sponsorship deal, naming the local stadium after his Los Angeles area “Hollywood and Vine Cellars” business starting next season. Nary a dry eye was to be found. I was blessed just to be there.

Full weekend results:

Sat., 5/18
#10 Suddery 2 vs. 1 #5 Crovan’s Gate
#19 Tidmouth City 4 vs. 4 #20 Arlesburgh Utd.
#18 Ulfstead 0 vs. 8 #13 Lakeside
#1 Dryaw 4 vs. 2 #3 Knapford Town
#16 Ffarquhar 4 vs. 1 #7 Wellsworth

Sun., 5/19
#11 Marron 4 vs. 3 #9 Glennock
#15 Brendam Harbor 6 vs. 2 #17 Brendam Utd.
#8 E.C.D. 4 vs. 3 #12 Vicarstown
#14 Castle Rolf 6 vs. 2 #2 Peel Godred
#6 Junction & Sheds 4 vs. 3 #4 Kirk Ronan

Here’s a smexy link to the updated Table.

In Review highlights

* With a 4-2 win – and coupled with Peel Godred's loss – Dryaw FC reclaim the #1 spot, leading by three points with just two Matchdays remaining.

* In the Brendam Derby II, Brendam Harbor wins 6-2, avenging their 0-7 loss to B-Utd. in the season's first edition.

* In the Walney Channel Derby II, East Coast Diesel wins a tense, sensational affair 4-3 over Vicarstown. Their match earlier this season ended in a 6-6 draw.

* Ffarquhar's win Saturday guarantees they can do no worse than tie for 18th, the last spot in the Relegation Zone. (Should there be a tie, a relegation playoff match will happen in Suddery.)

Feature Match in Review: Dryaw FC back alone in 1st

The fairy tale season for Dryaw is alive and well after a shiny 4-2 win over #3 Knapford Town!

As merely a larger village team, Dryaw were picked to finish well in the table’s bottom half. Yet with two matches to play, they now lead Peel Godred (matchday 36 upset victims) by three in the table. More, KTFC – while still 3rd – trail the leaders by five. This inaugural IoS PL season is now a two-horse race.

Image result for Knapford Town FC Knapford Town took advantage early (8′) for an 0-1 lead thanks to sloppy defensive play from Dryaw. A lazy pass from the center back was picked off midfield, flicked to an open man just outside the box and absolutely rocketed home. Dryaw‘s backstop had no shot at that top corner score!

Play ping ponged all over the pitch for nearly the rest of the first half, Knapford Town creating several more chances to just two for Dryaw. The halftime momentum looked to be all KTFC‘s when Dryaw‘s hero stemmed the tide! Picking on a shorter defender, Christopher Wilbertson took what was a mediocre lofted ball in the box and smashed home a header at 44′. Halftime: 1-1

All the second half, Dryaw pushed harder than ever, but could only trade single goals with the more offensively-balanced visitors. But just as it appeared things would go beyond 90′, disaster struck for the guests. Even with two defenders hard on Wilbertson, a third allowed himself to be lulled toward the star striker as he broke just a bit free. The pass went to the quickly-covered POTY candidate, who then himself had only to make a simple push pass to an open winger for a wide open gimme. 3-2 (89′!)

Dryaw would add one more on a corner set piece at 93′ to make the final 4-2. (Noob predicted a 4-3 Dryaw result — not bad!)

Image result for BHFC crest Congrats are due today to Brendam Harbor on being their city’s unofficial champs with their Brendam derby win today over United. Image result for east coast diesel crest E.C.D.’s win over Vicarstown had to feel good in the Walney Channel derby, even if not quite big enough by margin to overcome the 0-7 butt-kicking they’d taken earlier this season.

Check in every day for IoS FA news! And remember, Matchday 37 is -Wednesday, 5/22!

Isle of Sodor Premier League 5/10 match postponements lead to revised sched

All Isle of Sodor Premier League matches slated for Wednesday, 5/8, were postponed due to the massive storm sweeping over the island.

The remaining PL schedule will be as follows:

Matchday 35 Sat., 5/11
Matchday 36 Wed. 5/15
Matchday 37 Sat., 5/18
Matchday 38 Sat., 5/25

Since no tiebreakers like goal differential are used in Sudric football, any two-way ties for the League Title or Relegation will be broken with single matches Saturday, June 1, at Suddery’s National Stadium.

If more than two teams are tied for these positions, necessary additional games will be scheduled for Wednesday, May 29, in Suddery.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – matchday 31 (4/6-7) – Sat., #17 tries to stay above the Drop Zone, hosting #3 trying to stay in the title race

Having no major landmass to the near west of it, Sodor catches the brunt of truly severe storms. Last weekend, the Isle got gobsmacked by one, so all games were postponed and the remaining season’s schedule simply shifted back a week.

Matchday 31 (Sat., 4/6) Preview (Sunday preview to follow tomorrow)

#18 Ffarquhar vs. #11 Lakeside
#6 Junction & Sheds vs. #8 Wellsworth
#12 Castle Rolf vs. #19 Tidmouth City
#2 Knapford Town vs. #14 Brendam Harbor

plus the Saturday Feature Match #17 Brendam Utd. vs. #3 Peel Godred

This should be one dandy of a match, full of desperate energy. United are just one slot in the table and one point ahead of #18 Ffarquhar – the Relegation line. PGFC are tied for 2nd, but four points behind league-leading Dryaw FC. [Click here for the current table.] Neither can afford to drop any points in pursuit of their respective goals with just a couple months of season remaining.

Image result for Boleyn fc crest United were featured in the Brendam Derby back in February and that brought them no good fortune whatsoever. There got utterly trucked, 7-0, by intracity rivals Brendam Harbor. Their trajectory, their problems have remained the same. They absolutely cannot score. On Sodor, where defense is typically an afterthought, that’s confusing and unmanageable. They’ve scored all of two goals in their last four matches, going 0-1-3, are in real danger of the Drop.

Noob had the sense coming into this inaugural Premier League season that B-Utd. were going to be competitive, maybe even title-chasers. Brendam’s one of the big, main towns on the Isle. They’ve always done well in the friendlies, tourneys and small regional leagues that have popped up up for brief times here over history. But I failed to realize that much more recently, the power had shifted to Harbor.

“United” was named such for the traditional reason. They are an amalgamation of former, much smaller teams from just inland. They do draw from Brendam Town, but more and more Harbor has been becoming the “city’s team”. B-Utd. has had to become mostly a provincial team, drawing much more heavily from the countryside population for players. That area of this southern peninsula is not populous, even by Sudric standards.

United want to become rivals to Harbor once again. For that to happen though, they’ll need to remake inroads into Brendam proper, expand the player pool from which they draw. Until then, they will likely continue to struggle mightily.

Image result for PGFC crest Peel Godred were featured just last matchday, so Noob will abbreviate. [Click here for that PGFC match feature article.] They’re 2-0-2 in their last four. And they need to string together wins in back to back matches for the first time in a while if they want to become the #1 contender to Dryaw.

Noob calls it: Peel Godred 1-6 Peel’s style is unique on Sodor, and so more recognizable to the rest of the world. They actually play some standard formations instead of throwing everyone forward all the time. That gives teams here fits, and has been particularly disastrous for teams in the table’s lower half. Noob’s generous to write United might score at all.

Isle of Sodor Premier League – matchday 28 (3/2-3) – Title contenders down to three

Matchday 28 (3/2-3) in Review

Sunday Feature Match: ONE team got a road win today…and the magic ride keeps goin’!

And then there were three, realistically. #5 Crovan’s Gate‘s loss leaves then ten points behind the league leaders. And today’s Feature Match result saw #1 Dryaw FC obliterate #4 Kirk Ronan 3-10! At nine points back with just nine matches to go, it’s safe to call the Churchmen cooked.

Winger Christopher Wilbertson was Dryaw‘s star, as he scored a gentleman’s hat trick (a goal and two assists) in each half. After the match, Wilbertson, had this to say to Noob:

"We're neither tall nor fast.   We have to play intelligently.  Our game plan was to go for just those 50-50 balls we had an 80% chance of getting."

Dryaw is famous as a quiet vacation village for intellectuals, particularly authors. Noob knows no one else could’ve spoken or written so…eloquently about the team’s game strategy. (Ok, maybe Ian Darke )

Sounds about right for Wilbertson, who also nearly broke his fool neck trying to recreate the famous “Klinsmann dive”.

Sun., 3/3
#8 Glennock 7 vs. 5 T12 Vicarstown
#20 Arlesburgh Utd. 5 vs. 3 T12 Marron
#15 Lakeside 2 vs. 1 #10 Suddery
#5 Crovan’s Gate 4 vs. 5 #9 Junction & Sheds
#4 Kirk Ronan 3 vs. 10 #1 Dryaw

Continue down for Saturday’s results and feature match recap. Click [here] for the updated league table.

Saturday Feature Match: A change in the Relegation Zone!

Image result for Norramby crest It’s hard to call it a true upset, but Noob predicted a draw. Instead, Ulfstead have climbed above the Cutline with a resounding victory! A 4-4 halftime score was inline with expectations, but Ffarquhar looked fatigued again just minutes into the second half.

Image result for FFFC football crest So, Ffarquhar drop to 18th, two points behind today’s victors. Ulfstead is up to 17th, next have struggling Brendam United in their sights in the table.

On the table’s top, Peel Godred eked out a low-scoring win, but that’s good enough to climb back into 2nd place! How? Because #2 Knapford Town went to Castle Rolf and got busted in the mouth. Peel now sit just a point behind Dryaw, who have their hands full tomorrow as they visit #4 Kirk Ronan.

Here are the day’s full results. The Page with the Table will be updated following tomorrow’s matches.

Sat., 3/2
#3 Peel Godred 2 vs. 0 #16 Brendam Utd.
#11 Castle Rolf 13 vs. 6 #2 Knapford Town
#7 Wellsworth 5 vs. 4 #6 E.C.D.
#19 Tidmouth City 6 vs. 1 #14 Brendam Harbor
#18 Ulfstead 8 vs. 4 #17 Ffarquhar

Isle of Sodor Premier League – matchday 28 (Sat., 3/2) preview – Who stays up, who goes down

Sat., 3/2
#3 Peel Godred vs. #16 Brendam Utd.
#11 Castle Rolf vs. #2 Knapford Town
#7 Wellsworth vs. #6 E.C.D.
#19 Tidmouth City vs. #14 Brendam Harbor
#18 Ulfstead vs. #17 Ffarquhar

Saturday Feature Match: A drop zone battle royal!

Wellsworth – E.C.D. has the best chance today to be a truly quality match. But the title race is really down to five teams now, and these two are on the outside looking in. So, today’s most important match is about Premier League survival.

Image result for Norramby crest Hello from Ulfstead! Here, just a month ago the local team’s Relegation fate appeared sealed. But three wins against just one loss in February has them just out of safety, a point behind their closest geographic rivals today.

All season, their issue has been consistency, They can score and defend well enough, but rarely managed both in the same match all winter. Other than giving up a whopping 14 goals in their road loss to Marron, they’ve played better all-around ball of late.

A note about Ulfstead F.C. “Earls” – Ulfstead is the town name here in west-central Sodor. It is the home of the Isle’s Earls (the royal family), the Norramby’s. But Norramby the town is on the east central coast. They have their own team in the second-tier Championship (and are doing quite well!.

Image result for FFFC football crest The road team today only had to travel a handful of miles east. It will be a shame if Ffarquhar doesn’t survive the Isle’s first-ever Premier season. It’s one of the larger towns on the isle, but only has the one FA club. It’s also the one town people outside the country can name, if any — being the home of Thomas of the fictional children’s tv show.

But this team’s season has followed it’s FA Cup performance from the summer. They play everyone close, but play up and down to the level of their competition. And they far from always finish off matches strong. Still, a 2-1-1 February mark shows they’re learning and has kept them above the Cutline.

Fun Fact: Ffarquhar are known as “the Anophas”, though the S is dropped as often as not. The nearby Ffarquhar Quarry was known as Anopha Quarry, and so that name has been adopted by the club. This, despite not a bloody soul in the town having the slightest clue what “Anopha” referred to or meant originally.

Match Prediction: Noob thinks the battle to stay afloat in the Premier will go right down to the end of the season. The teams will play true their forms of late and have a match of quality play. 4-4 or 5-5.

Isle of Sodor Premier League matchday 24 results, updated table

The three key results from last weekend’s fixtures are in bold.

#1 vs #2 was a rout in favor of the league leaders. They lead by just three, but the contenders have changed. How far did former #2 Peel Godred fall? Did either of the Relegation candidates’ upsets move them above the cutline? Scroll down past the results for the updated table.

2/2	#3 Kirk Ronan	9	5	#T7 Wellsworth
	#T13 Brendam Harbor	10	10	#T7 Junction & Sheds
	#9 Glennock	4	8	#20 Arlesburgh Utd.
	#11 Vicarstown	5	5	#19 Tidmouth City
	#18 Ulfstead	8	3	#T13 Brendam Utd.


2/3	#16 Marron	2	7	#4 Knapford Town
	#5 Crovan’s Gate	6	8	#6 E.C.D.
	#12 Suddery	6	3	#10 Castle Rolf
	#T13 Lakeside	5	7	#17 Ffarquhar
	#1 Dryaw FC	13	3	#2 Peel Godred

		W	D	L	PTS
1	Dryaw	18	4	2	58	League Champions
2	Kirk Ronan	17	4	3	55
3	Knapford Town	17	4	3	54
4	Peel Godred	17	2	5	53
5	Crovan’s Gate	15	5	4	50
6	East Coast Diesel	13	6	5	45
7	Junction & Sheds	11	4	7	37
8	Wellsworth	11	3	8	36
9	Glennock	10	4	10	34
10	Castle Rolf	8	6	10	30
10	Suddery	8	6	10	30
10	Vicarstown	7	9	8	30
13	Brendam Harbor	7	5	12	26
14	Lakeside	7	4	13	25
14	Brendam United	7	4	13	25
16	Marron	6	4	14	22
17	Ffarquhar	5	4	15	19
18	Ulfstead	4	4	16	16	Relegated to Sodor Championship
19	Arlesburgh United	4	1	19	13
20	Tidmouth City	3	3	18	12

Sodor Premier League news! Tim Howard who? 80-year old Sudric goalie announces retirement

January 30, 2019 – Arlesburgh, Sodor

Colin Lee, -80- year old goalie for Arlesburgh United Pirates Image result for soccer crest pirates of the Isle of Sodor Premier League has announced his retirement from competitive play. When asked what he thought of the MLS Colorado Rapids‘ 39 year-old Tim Howard‘s hanging them up after the 2019 season, Mr. Lee gruffly said, “Blargh. I have bunions older than that quitter.”

This 2011 Daily Mail article details his full English career; click here)

In 2012, Mr. Lee Veteran: Colin Lee, 72, started playing football when he was just six years old and has now been regularly partaking in the beautiful game for an incredible 66 years was sacked as secretary for eight Northampton, England area teams and as keeper for his Sunday League squad. His former Air Force Veterans’ teammate, 56 year-old Ollie Hight had this to say:

“The guy was 72. He did a lot of good, but it was time for him to bugger off, make room for up-and-comers like me.”

Colin Lee then retired across the Walney Channel to Arlesburgh, in the northwest of Sodor. Image result for Arlesburgh Sodor map As the oldest established town on the Isle, he found it suited him well. Here, he continued his 50-plus year career as a goalie, only occasionally reverting to his youth position of centre half.

But Arlesburgh United find themselves in last place in this, the inaugural IoSPL season. With Lee in a platoon at goalkeeper, the team has given up nearly seven goals per match, a staggering number even by loose-defense Sodor standards.

“If the other team kicks it right at me, I’ve got a shot. But they’ve figured out my weaknesses after having faced each club once on the year — I have trouble covering wide. And high. And low. I can actually get low sometimes, but then I can’t get back up and they sub me out.”

“I hope Tim Howard finds broadcasting dull and decides to replace me here. Perhaps he can get the team promoted to Premier again next year. Because we’re sure as shit getting sent down this season.”