Tag: World Cup

’10 to Track’ Weekend Edition soccer matches – World Cup extra, MLS, NWSL lead the way

As World Cup approaches its climactic end, Noob knows soccer will fade a bit from America’s collective conscience.

Keep visiting here.  Keep learning with Noob.  I’ll keep previewing the ten most important  matches to follow for us – the newish fans of the global game.

And it won’t get weird.  And Noob’s a fibber.

  1. Belgium vs. England – FIFA World Cup

Noob.  Nooby!   Didn’t these teams just lose?

Yes.  And did you just go Harry Ellis on me?  Well-played, pretend writer-in/voice in Noob’s head.  You’re my white knight.

Aaaaanyway, this is the Bronze Match.  If you’ve been reading Tracks, you know the names:  de Bruyne, Kane.

The NCAA used to make the last non-finalists play this kind of crappy game.  They just lost.  This is once every four years.  A lot of the players won’t ever get that sort of chance again.  Let them go home.

Yay, footyball!

RESULT:   Belgium    2-0

B.  New York Red Bulls vs. Sporting Kansas City – Major League Soccer

Kansas City had been leading the Western Conference for forever.  But a couple of road loses (Real Salt Lake: ok, Montreal: really?) and a home draw against tuckered out-Toronto and they’ve slipped to 3rd.  Their defense s letting them down, something that never happened in last season’s strong campaign.

3rd-place Red Bulls are coming off a “road” loss to fellow East contender NYCFC.  They have regional rival New England Revolution up next.  Still, Noob doesn’t see this as a trap game.  They’ve only conceded four goals in their last six matches.

To appease the Management – with his K.C. ties – Tim Melia needs to step his goalkeeping back up.  The back line has been okayish.  He has not.

(NYCFC hosting Columbus is just as big today.)

RESULT:   NYRB   3-2

Image result for tim melia sporting kc

 

 

 

Tim Melia tries to defend Zlatan with the trip over me comically-technique.

 

  1. Chicago Red Stars vs. Seattle Reign – National Women’s Soccer League

“Dear Lord in heaven, hear our cries!  Please let us remain #B/climb to 3rd in the standings so we don’t have to get decimated by North Carolina in the first round of the Playoffs.  We submit ourselves to Your will.  What do you require of us, Most Holy?”

Chicago is tied for 3rd.  Seattle is #B.

RESULT:   Chicago   1-0

  1. Legia Warsaw vs. Arka Gydnia – Poland Super Cup

It’s Sooooooper Cup season!

These are nearly always matchups between the previous league season’s champion and the defending FA Cup titlists.  They are typically one-offs.  Sometimes at neutral sites, sometimes not.  They are glorified exhibitions to whet folks’ appetites for the imminent starts of the new league seasons.

Legia Warsaw finished 3rd in the first part of the 2017-18 regular season before making off with 1st place once the Championship Round began.  They also just beat Cork City (Ireland) in the UEFA Champions League, 0-1.  They host today’s match.

Arka Gydnia narrowly missed out on qualifying for that Champions Round, 7th place.  After that, they sank, though not quite far enough to get Relegated to the second division.

RESULT:   Gdynia   2-3

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Noob ever has a club of his own, they’re “The Ligers”.

  1. CFR Cluj vs. CS Universitatea Craiova – Romania Super Cup

Cluj won the truly regular league season and then held on in the Championship Round to take the title.  Craiova are the defending FA Cup holders.  They finished 3rd in the league.   Craiova get to host today.

RESULT:   Cluj   1-0

  1. Albirex Niigata vs. Tampines Rovers – Singapore S.League

Noob is always down for #1 versus #B!  Not that Rovers are a threat to chase down the title.  The Japanese club reserve team is 15-0-0.  But as a reserve team, they’re not eligible for international competition like AFC Champions league.  That means #B is the slot that could qualify.

Rovers lead Home United by just a point in the table.  If they have any shot at a result today, it has to be on defense.  They sport the league’s second-best.

RESULT:   Niigata   2-1

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Fortnite’s popular with the hip kids. 

Noob’s not above throwing it in here.

 

Sunday

  1. France vs. Croatia – FIFA World Cup

The Final!  Luzhniki Stadium, Moscow.

France is ranked #7 in the world, Croatia #20.  if the latter win, they will be the second-smallest country to ever do so.

The battle is going to be hottest in the midfield.  For Croatia, Modric is the key to everything.  That he plays for Real Madrid tells you want you need to know about him.  He’s joined there by recent hero Rakitic.

For France, Mbappe is the young (19) and main man.   Tell Noob he doesn’t look like he’s about 35 when his forehead furrows.  Yikes.  Kante is the other man there who will be key to ball control.

Thanks for hanging with Noob during this awesome Cup.  I hope the mini-previews have been helpful even in their brevity.  Fun, and for the newest fans, encouraging in that you’ve been able to pick up just enough to enjoy the game a little bit more and to chat with friends who’ve followed the game longer.

Now go, be free!  Seek out more in-depth pregame analysis.  Noob will, too.

RESULT:   France   4-2      Mbappe becomes only the second teenager ever to score in a World Cup final.  (Noob still thinks he looks 35.)

Image result for i release you gif

  1. LAFC vs. Portland Timbers – Major League Soccer

Expansion, surprising #B LAFC haven’t lost since June 2.  That one was at Dallas, the Western Conference’s #1.  During this torrid stretch, they’ve scored multiple goals every time out.

And if you think that’s impressive, Portland haven’t lost in 13 matches straight, since April 2!  How are they only in 5th?  But not getting a W in their first five of the season.   They’re baaaack.

For LAFC, Diamonde is the leading scorer.  Fellow forward Latif Blessing from Ghana has been smoking hot in July, too.  If both continue as they are, Houston and KC both may find themselves looking up at them in the table.

RESULT:   0-0

Blessing has something of a velociraptor-y look about him to Noob.

 

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Image result for velociraptor

  1. Monterrey vs. Necaxa – Supercopa MX

This is the first of two high-end exhibitions for Liga MX today.  They are both being held on the L.A. Galaxy’s home pitch.

The Supercopa pits the two Copa MX winners from last season against one another.  Just as the Liga MX season is divided into two separate halves (Apertura, Clausura), so they also play to Cup tournaments.  In the Clausura of 2017-18, these teams finished in 3rd and 11th, respectively.

RESULT:   Necaxa   0-1

  1. UANL Tigres vs. Santos – Campeon de Campeones

These two won the Apertura and Clausura liguillas (post-season playoffs) last season.  This is considered a friendly and not for the title of overall Mexican league champion.  The winner will play the last MLS champions in their home city (Toronto) in the inaugural Campeones Cup in September.

RESULT:   UANL   4-0

Image result for four-way soccer

 

All four should play at once.

THEN you’d get a real champion.

’10 to Track’ soccer matches: Globetrotting Friday

TGIGF!

Since the World Cup is bringing new Noobite eyes, here’s our m.o.  Noob normally previews the ten most important matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game.

On Friday, we start with these matches of matches, but then span the globe!  Friday schedules tend to be light, so we pack our gear, head off for soccer hinterlands less-known.

Let’s get to know some clubs, leagues and locales.  Up, up, and away.

  1. Brazil vs. Belgium – FIFA World Cup

And then there were eight, Noobites.  It’s a shame these two are meeting this early in the tournament, being the #B and #3-ranked teams in the world.

Brazil managed only a draw against Switzerland (which also advanced from the Group Stage), but has handled business perfectly since.  They beat Mexico 2-0 in the Round of 16, with both teams getting mouthy during and after the match.  Brazil star Neymar did his usual routine by flopping around on the ground like he’d been Tasered when someone breathed on him hard.

Belgium made a little history in their last match, falling behind 0-2 to the loveable Japanese team before storming back.  If Noob understand correctly, no team in WC had come back from down two goals to win (maybe win specifically in regulation time) since WEST Germany back in the 1970’s.

Belgium’s subs saved them, being more physical than the starters and keying their comeback victory.  Talk is that they will start with more “power” for this match, play some of those guys earlier. And Belgium has already been the highest-scoring team in the tournament. Still, star midfielder de Bruyne is who to watch – the team goes as he does.  For Brazil, it’s Neymar.

And there you have it.  Mini-preview, enough to get you through over-the-neighbor’s-fence chat level.  Now go, be free!  Google you up some deeper pregame analysis if the itch needs more scratching.  Noob will, too.

RESULT:   Belgium   1-2     Brazil headed one into their own goal off a Belgian corner kick.    de Bruyne scored the game-winner.

Image result for chatting over the fence

 

 

“Your soccer knowledge impress me.

Mytwitfacespacebookme sometime, you hunky yard-raker, you.”

B.  East Coast Diesel vs. Cronk – Isle of Sodor Cup

The Round of 16 continues, as does Noob’s seemingly exclusive online coverage of the inaugural Sudric FA Cup!  Let’s get to know our combatants.

E.C.D is one of the two clubs formed in Vicarstown, which is just across the water from Cumbria, England.  They dominated their Group, winning all three matches by a total margin of 10-1.

They’ve been projected to be included in the first-ever IoS Premier League in a few months, though barely.  Their inclusion seems guaranteed now.  Which of the three divisions clubs will play in will be in part based on how teams fare in this tournament.

Diesel are a big-boy team.  They control space in the end thirds of the pitch, are as close to a physical team as Sodor has.  Teams that have success against them control the midfield with ease.  E.C.D.’s guys aren’t fast.

Cronk are slated to be in the Second Division, and not expected to complete for the title in Year one.  They may be the weakest team to have survived the Group Stage.  That said, they did manage a draw against much bigger Tidmouth City after being blown out by Knapford Town.

From a distance, Cronk proper looks like little more than an overgrown estate on a big rock overlooking a valley.  It is a traditional and historic village, just oddly- (and coolly) placed, overlooking the pristine Hawin Ab valley in the center of the Isle.  The small villages of Abbey, Kildane and Maron are all nearby, providing a bit larger of a pool of potential players to draw from than perhaps some realized.  Might be why they’re having a measure of success.

The winner today gets either Tidmouth City or Callan.

RESULT:   E.C.D.  0-0  /  5-4 pk       Scoreless after 90′ is NOT something one expects in Sodor.  A pop-up shower good and wet the field about 10 minutes in and that affected the pace.  

Image result for Vicarstown Ireland hotel

 

 

 

Noob just rents a room above the bar, my fave watering hole in the ‘Vic.

  1. Portland Thorns vs. Utah Royals – NWSL

Expansion Utah are making a move on the Playoffs!  A home draw against #B Seattle was a fine result, and then they walloped horrid Sky Blue FC.  They’re just a point behind Chicago for the last postseason berth.

Portland are trending the other direction, a point behind Utah in the table.  They only achieved a draw with Sky Blue before losing to Seattle.  Hardly a terrible loss, but will the Thorns be energized or deflated after losing to their regional rivals?

RESULT:   Portland   4-0

  1. Penn FC vs. Bethlehem Steel – USL

Bethlehem are in 8th place, hanging onto the last playoff slot in the Eastern Conference by the hair on their Steely chins.  They just thrashed 7th-place Charlotte.

Penn are in 11th and loved to take the air out of the ball early in the season.  They hadn’t been as successful that style as fellow Pennsylvanians Pittsburgh Riverhounds.  They scored a lot more in June and are on a five-match unbeaten streak.

RESULT:   Penn   3-2

Image result for Bethlehem Steel ben stiller

 

 

Derek Zoolander — #1 supporter

  1. Persija Jakarta vs. PSM Makassar – Indonesia Liga 1

And now we Trot the Globe!  Welcome to the #27-ranked league in Asia, just a shade below average.   The drama is anything but, though.  Just over a dozen matches into the season and 18th/last place and 1st are separated by just ten points in the table.

And #1 is Makassar.  Jakarta are four points behind in 3rd.  Only the league’s winner will even possibly make the AFC Champions League.  They could be instead assigned to the lesser AFC Cup.

Fun Fact:  Persija Jakarta are “the Kematyoran Tigers”, named for a subdistrict in Jakarta.

RESULT:   2-2

  1. Lao Army vs. Lao Toyota – Lao League

We move now a little north and a little farther down the AFC league rankings (#35) to Laos!  This league has eight clubs, down from 14 just two years ago.  Noob’s sources are conflicted as to whether two teams are still being relegated annually.

If that’s still happening, Lao Army are set to get The Boot, second-to-last place.  They don’t defend.  Noob’s not sure they try.  And that’s a bad tach when #1 is coming to town.  Lao Toyota have more than 4x the goal differential of any other team.

RESULT:     now slated for tomorrow

Image result for city of sandalwood vientiane

 

Fun Fact:   Lao Army are from the capital, Vientiane, which translates originally as “city of sandalwood”.

  1. Selenge Press vs. Daren – Mongolia Premier

Asian league #41.  The winner here will also only qualify for AFC Cup, and a Preliminary Round at that.  But hey – they’re playing!  These are the 5th and 6th-place teams in the league, respectively.

Fun Fact:   Ulaanbaatar translates to “Red Hero City”.  Most of the clubs in this league are from there, the capital.

RESULT:   Daren   0-2

  1. Nam Dinh vs. Song Lam Nghe An – Vietnam V.League 1

Let’s yo-yo up to the top half of the federation’s rankings (#19).  Even up here, the league winner may make Champions League or Asia Cup.

Nam Dinh are about to not be “up here”.  They’re in second-to-last place.  Should they stay there, they’ll have to play a Relegation match or matches with a V.League 2 club at season’s end.   Nghe An are one of the most successful clubs in the nation’s history, but only in 6th this year.

RESULT:   Nghe An   2-3

Image result for water puppetry

 

Fun Fact:   Water puppetry was created in the Red River Delta region, which Nam Dinh calls home.

  1. Mawyawadi vs. Rakhine United – Myanmar National League

Same situation here in the #25 league.  The winner might go to CL or AFC Cup.

Not that either of these teams need worry about that.  Mawyawadi are in distant last place.  They’re biggest team weakness:  football.  Rakhine are in 9th place, should spend their season trying to stay out of second-to-last place and getting demoted.

Fun Fact:   Nay Pyi Taw – the purpose-built national capital city might be the home of Mawyawadi.  or it might be the former capital, Yangon, that is their home base.  Noob’s sources are conflicted.

RESULT:   2-6   Rakhine

  1. Zaria vs. Victoria Bardar – Moldova Cup

We’ll end the Track making or way back westward into Europe.  This FA Cup is in its Round of 16.  Zaria are in last place in the top-flight league, but won the first match in this two-legged tie 1-4.  Victoria Bardar are a midtable, second-division club.

This is one of the most competitive ties going this round.  There have been about nothing but epic blowouts in between most of the other teams.

RESULT:   Zaria   4-1

Image result for Zaria Balti auction

 

 

Fun Fact:   In 2009, Zaria auctioned off a one-year player contract online.

’10 to Track’ Midweek Edition soccer matches – World Cup and Isle of Sodor cup knockout stages lead the way

Updated.  For her pleasure (Wed., 3:35  PM EST)

Midweek Edition is now complete.  Matches for Thursday are previewed, results for previous days are UP.

  1. Colombia vs. England – FIFA World Cup

So lots of folks think England intentionally blew their last Group Stage match versus Belgium in order to get a perceived easier path to deep in the tournament.  Noob thinks that sort of stuff might have made Colombia’s locker room bulletin board.

England looked dynamite in their first tournament match — against Panama.  They squeaked by Tunisia 1-2 with an injury time goal.  This team didn’t come to Russia with tons of hype.  They’re very young.

Colombia pummeled Poland and took down Senegal to win their Group.  But that was after a loss to FIFA-ranked #61 Japan to start their WC.  Admittedly, Japan surprised everyone and advanced.  And Colombia had been down to ten men after an early handball saw one of their players red-carded.

James Rodiguez is Colombia’s star and was injured in the last match, if not seriously.  He should be available, but may doubt he will start the match.  England = Harry Kane.  He has five WC goals so far.

And there you have it, mini-preview success!  This should get you through water cooler chat-level convo about the game.  Now go, be free!   Search out in-depth pregame analysis if your heart goes pitapat for such.  Noob will; his does.   (2:00 PM Eastern, Fox)

RESULT:   England   1-1  /  3-4 pk      England gave up their lead in stoppage time, then fell behind in penalty kicks before coming back to win.

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Is it always sunny at the water cooler?

B.  Houston Dynamo vs. LAFC – MLS

Watch this game.  Expansion club LAFC score like it protects their mothers’ reputations.  Offense galore!   They struggle on defense, but they’re still #3 in the Western Conference.

Houston is 7th there, just outside the Playoff picture.  The Dynamo look superb on paper.  But they lose a lot of close matches, earn very few draws.  Is it a toughness issue?

One of LAFC’s key offensive cogs is red-hot Adama Diomande.  The Oslo, Norway native scored seven times in June.  Previously he has played for Hull City in England’s second-tier Championship league.  (9:00 PM, ESPN+)

RESULT:   2-2     Houston scored twice in the 90′ to come back for a draw.

Image result for adama diomande funny

 

Noob had no idea the balls they played with across the pond were so odd.

  1. Cabalnoo vs. Crovan’s Gate – Isle of Sodor Cup

The Round of 16 knockout stage continues!  Let’s profile today’s combatants:

Cabalnoo stunned the Isle in the Group Stage, winning Group B.  They scored far and away the most goals (25!) in the three matches while also giving up the most (15).   That slashing, daring style is hardly unique on Sodor, where defense isn’t exactly a prized virtue.  But those numbers are nutso.  Will they continue in the same aggressive fashion, or become conservative now that the tournament is one-and-done?

Cabalnoo is such a surprise because it is such a small village.  They’ve been projected to start their league play in the bottom, Third Division when the inaugural leagues start in a few months.  They had to win qualifying matches just to get to the Group Stage.

It’s just small, idyllic village on a railway line.  A lot of milling takes place for the surrounding countryside farmers here.  But no other villages of note are fielding an official Club anywhere else in this south-central part of the Isle, so they’re drawing players from a bit larger area than many may have realized.

The story of Group A was that Toryreck wrecked all comers.  Crovan’s Gate is a pretty low-end average team that beat the other two also-rans on tiebreaking goal differential by just not getting housed by the winners.

The Village of Crovan’s Gate is the most southwesterly incorporated area on Sodor, though well inland.  It’s a hub for industrial equipment repair, and so has a lot of transplants from other parts of the Isle.  Perhaps in some way people coming to live here for those particular jobs plays into the strange nickname for the football club – “The Grumpy Passengers”.

RESULT:   Crovan’s Gate   7-8     Neither side led by more than one AND CG game back to win late.

  1. Reno 1868 vs. Real Monarchs SLC – USL

Noob shakes his fist at you, “Real”!   No royalty in ‘Muricuh, not now, not ever.  Utah is weird.  OK, now that’s out of my system.

Reno haven’t lost a league match since mid-April, but lots o’ draws means they’ve only climbed to 5th place.  Accursed-SLC leads the Western Conference and man alive are they tough to score on.  Last year, Reno scored on everyone at will, but this year is more defensively-oriented.

Noob thinks the matchup is a bad one for the Nevadans.

RESULT:   Reno   3-0     Then again, they were at home 🙂

Image result for Reno 1868 funny

Noob can’t quite put his finger on why, but Chris Weham just looks Nevadan.  No matter where he might actually be from.

Wednesday

  1. Dallas FC vs. Atlanta United – MLS

Atlanta is coming of a pasting of rival Orlando City.  Possibility of a letdown is here, though one would think travelling to the #B team in the Western Conference will keep them on their toes.

Dallas trail only Kansas City in that conference, despite having lost two of their last three matches.  They win a lot, yet haven’t beaten a truly good team sin a month (LAFC).  This will be an excellent test to see if they’re truly capable of being a championship-caliber team.

Atlanta is a goal-scoring behemoth, yet Noob believes their success starts at the other end of the field.  Veteran goalkeeper Brad Guzan spent nearly a decade in the English Premier League.  He is used to directing intelligent defenses, has the team as a top-three unit in the East.   (8:00 PM, ESPN+)

RESULT:   Dallas   3-2    Akindele with the tying and go-ahead goals at almost 90′.

  1. Real Salt Lake vs. Sporting Kansas City – MLS

Speak of the leaders and they appear.  They hadn’t lost a match since April until lowly Montreal beat them two-nothing.  As perplexing as that may be, the road is hard for most everyone.  They’re an incredibly well-balanced team.  Noob thinks they will hold one for the #1 seed in the West.

RSL is a target of Noob’s ire and rage!   I will never tire of pointing out that ‘Muricuh has no royalty to dub anything “royal”.  The “Claret and Cobalt” snobs are in 5th place, but how?  They can’t score worth a darn and yet have only two draws.  Win or bust for them most every time out.

The Management has KC ties and will be cheering hard for them.   Noob hates to suck up to the boss, but I will be joining him in it.  (10:00 PM, ESPN+)

RESULT:   RSL   4-2

Image result for ire and rage funny

 

Noob bottles none.  But may head to a bulk store and stock up now.

  1. North Carolina Courage vs. Chicago Red Stars – NWSL

Chicago’s been enjoying a favorable run in their schedule, haven’t lost in four matches, and have climbed into a tie for 3rd.  Wonderful!  Now they head into the #1 Courage’s gladiatorial arena, equipped figuratively with only a dull stick.  Footyball death and destruction await them.

RESULT:   NC   4-1

Thursday

  1. Toryreck vs. Ffarrquhar – Isle of Sodor Premier Cup

Play on Sodor has always been unstructured.  Mini-seasons between quickly-formed leagues, small day tournaments.  It’s always been there, but very fluid.  Because of this, the new FA on Sodor had a hard time judging which teams would be strongest.  They went primarily on town or village size for putting teams into Pots for the Group Stage draw.

And boy was that method seemingly inaccurate!  Toryreck were the lowest-seeded team in Pot 4.  They had to play qualifying matches against other very small village teams just to get to the Group Stage.  There, they dominated, outscoring opponents 15-3.

Not too far inland from Knapford on the east-central coat, Toryreck used to be known as a lead mining area.  These days, the joke about the village is not to drink the milk there.  One of the two main dairies on the Isle is nearby, but now the primary mining is of uranium.

Ffarquhar is a larger village, known most for its general rock-quarrying.  The big Anopha Quarry isn’t even all that far north of Toryreck, and so these teams know one another very well.  The double F were pretty average during the Group Stage, but did enough to finish second behind East Coast Diesel.

The winner here gets either E.C.D. or Cronk in the Quarterfinals.

RESULT:   2-3   Ffarquhar

Image result for radioactive milk

 

 

Noob loves how someone designed this to show that milk goes in the glass to complete the danger-cycle.

  1. Engordany vs. Folgore – Europa League

UEFA’s version of American’ college basketball’s NIT has already begun!   This is the Preliminary Round, where FA Cup and #B-finishers from the lowest-ranked Euro leagues compete.

Engoradny finished #B in Andorra’s top domestic league last season.  Folgore was second-best in San Marino.  The Andorrans won the first match of the two-legged tie 2-1.  The winner will advance to play Lithuanian club Zalgiris Vilnius.

Noob doesn’t have a lot to tell you about these teams, Noobites.  The point is more to know that the event has begun at all.

RESULT:   Engo   1-1   /  3-2 pk

  1. Ludogorets Razgrad vs. Slavia Sofia – Bulgaria Super Cup

The Bulgarian First League’s 2018-19 season begins in less than three weeks.  Like in many nations, they’re league defending champs and the last FA Cup winner face off in a fancy exhibition to whet folks’ appetites.  The game is in Sofia, though not at Slavia’s home pitch.

Slavia Sofia did very well to win the FA Cup.   They didn’t do all that well in league certainly.  They didn’t even make the top 6 (of14) and make the championship subdivision near season’s end.  Ludo (and CSKA Sofia) steamrolled the rest of the league.

Slavia beat Levski Sofia in this event last year.  Still, if Slavia can keep this within a goal today, Noob will be impressed.

RESULT:   L.R.   1-0

Image result for Bulgaria impressed funny

 

 

Breed a rideable sheep-pig?

THAT impresses.

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Relegation Monday – World Cup, Isle of Sodor, suckitude, and Lalas

‘T’will be an EPIC Monday.

Relegation matches, celebrating the suckitude of teams about to go down a league?  Check.  Oh, and did Noob dig deep to find them.

World Cup!  Natch.  Isle of Sodor – Knockout Round of 16 begins.

And for that last, we’ve brought in Alexi Lalas, American soccer hero.  You read that right.  The Lalas.   Noobites, it’s a special day.

  1. Mexico vs. Brazil – FIFA World Cup

Many an American has jumped on the bandwagon for “El Tri”.  Many others have bashed the former for it.  Noob holds no position.  Root for a neighbor; cheer against our rivals.  No lives or loves are lost over it.  And it anyone gives you grief, you poonch that naysayer right in the snoosage.

Noob’s research shows Mexico are 6:1 underdogs.   Brazil are the five-time champions and ranked #2 in the world, so it’s understandable.  But Mexico did beat #1 Germany (now out of the tournament), so nothing result here would be earth-shattering.

Brazil brings so much firepower, they will be hard to contain.  Neymar.  Coutinho.  Paulinho, too, if those first two get too covered up.  For Mexico, Javier Hernandez if their penalty box-prowler who will be looking for stickbacks.

And there you have it, Noobites!   Just enough to get you through water cooler chat.  Now go, be free!  Search out more in-depth analysis on the interwebs, should the Spirit move you.  Noob will.   (10:00 AM, Fox)

RESULT:   Brazil   2-0     Mexico apparently talked a lot.  Neymar, as usual, flopped a lot and got tons of calls.

Image result for water cooler gossip funny

B.  Brendam Harbor vs. Junction & Sheds – Isle of Sodor Premier

Now that the Knockout Round is here, a little about each of our competitors:

B.H hosts today’s match.  Brendam is one of the few towns seemingly large enough for two clubs, even non-professional ones on Sodor.  Brendam Harbor draws its players from the actual harbor area and southern city-proper.  Everyone on Sodor is a hard worker, but this is definitely the blue collar, working man’s team.

Brendam United plays just north of the city, further inland on this south-centrally located peninsula.  They are more “suburban”, if Sodor has what most would call truly “urban” areas.

While there isn’t much in the way of mean-spiritedness regarding much of anything on Sodor (occasional crossness, certainly), be sure that the Harbormen are happy the purported best team on the island in United didn’t make it out of the Group Stage.  Harbor are considered second-best, on the entire Isle even.  Once the first-ever IoS Premier League starts in a few months, we’ll all see who everyone truly stacks up though.

Knapford is a larger town than Brendam, one of the two “main towns” on the island. It sits on the central West Coast, just southwest across the water from southeast Isle of Man.

Just like Brendam, the town fields two clubs (Knapford Town the other).  Both have their blue-collar bases.  Historically, J&S have drawn from the eastern, more inland portion of Knapford.  The club was started by railway workers.  (Knapford Town is east “old town” Knapford, predominately dockyard and harbor territory.

Only five of the eight teams from Pot One – considered the best on the Isle – survived the Group Stage.  Here, two of them face off.  Brendam Harbor won group D with what few teams play much of on Sodor – defense.  J&S go totally the other way.  They allowed 14 goals in three Group Stage matches, still advanced with a positive goal differential.

Noob is on the Tweeterbox, and had the good fortune to get in a Q&A with an American soccer all-timer and current broadcaster recently.   His take when asked who would win the match:

“Shed’s in the bag.” – Alexi Lalas

The Lalas has spoken!   Now to find out if his words are truly, well, truth.  Let the Round of 16 begin!

RESULT:   Brendam Harbor   4-4 / 3-2 pk      What a start to the Knockout Stage!    The Lalas got it wrong.  Chalk one up for Noobstradamus!   Though I’m not sure anyone saw the unusual manner of it all coming.

Late, one of the J&S players must have misunderstood something one of the BH players said.  The Shedder replied with a very unkind comment – which will not be repeated here – about the Harborman’s Manx heritage.

For those less familiar with Sudric culture — they’re a kind people, industrious… but good golly do they dislike the Isle of Man/Manx. 

They’re long since tired out on jokes about everyone knowing Man exists, but that some think Sodor is a fictional location just because of the books and TV series set there.

So J&S played the last 15 minutes with just ten players, Brendam H. caught up, and pk’s went the way of the hosts.  The Lalas is forgiven; Noobstradamus is commended.

Image result for Alexi Lalas funnyImage result for Noobstradamus

 

 

 

 

 

Oh, so this has-been ginger is doing your prognosticating now?  We’ll see about THAT.  My vision says Brendam Harbor wins, 6-1!  I am Noobstradamus.  -I- have spoken.

  1. Huachipato vs. Deportes Copiapo – Copa Chile

Chile’s FA Cup is also in its Round of 16.  Here, they play two-legged ties instead of simply single-match Knockouts.  10-th place Premier side Huachipato won the first game 1-2.

Copiapo plays in Primera B, the nation’s second tier.  They are part of a five-way tie in the table for three of the spots in the league’s Promotion Playoff.  Their focus should largely be on league, getting up to Primera level.  Hauchi will take this match, sweep the tie.   (8:15 PM, GOL TV)

RESULT:   1-1      Huachipato advances to the Quarters!

  1. LDU de Quito vs. Universidad Catolica – Ecuador Serie A

#1 hosts #3 in a distinct clash of styles.   Quito have built their three-point lead in the table (five over Catolica) on the league’s best defense.  UdC is tied for the league’s top offense.

RESULT:   Quito   2-1

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Que horror, es el pirate-Noob!

  1. Samgurali II vs. Aragvi Dusheti – Georgia Liga III

Third-tier Georgian league – you keep playing on Mondays, Noob’ll make you famous(ish)!

The bottom half of this 20-club league is jousting for Relegation Playoff seeding.  Samgurali are in second-to-last, and Noob thinks it could get worse.  Dusheti is in 13th, and that looks right, based on their stats.  S-II aren’t even an even match at home here.

Fun Fact:   Stalin would visit a  Bathhouse 9 in this spa resort town (Tsqaltubo) where Samgurali clubs are based.

RESULT:   Dusheti   0-4

  1. Guria vs. Matchakhela – Georgia Liga III

Matchakhela are in last place.  Neither they nor S-II can score worth a darn, but Match are less completely-awful on defense.  Not that they will be able to stop #4 Guria.  That team’s just two points outside a berth in the Promotion playoffs.  They hear the siren call of Liga II and will not be denied today.

RESULT:   Guria   1-0

Flag of Adjara

 

 

Matchakhela’s region of Adjara is an autonomous one within Georgia.

  1. Kolkheti Khobi vs. Samegrelo – Georgia Liga III

#16 Samegrelo are an interesting case in that they’re GD could or should have them much higher in the table.  They belong in the Relegation Playoff, make no mistake, but if they’d seal some deals instead of settling for so many draws, they could jump several spots in the table.

This won’t be the day they move that direction though.  K.K. are #B, and excel on both sides of the ball.  They’ll win by a couple.

Fun Fact:  When aske, “How do you pronounce Samegrelo’s townlet of Chkhorotsku?”, the correct response is to enunciate very slowly, “I don’t.”

RESULT:   K.K.   1-0

  1. Mjolner vs. Stabaek II – Norway Second Division

This is actually the Norwegian third tier of football.  Noob told you it was a time of year to dig deeply for Relegation sensation-matches.

Mjolner are 4th in the league.  They’ve played one fewer matches than most and will likely jump two spots after pasting today’s creampuffs.

Said creampuffs are one-win Stabaek II.  They do nothing remotely well and they are in last place, as is appropriate.  They’ll be one of the three teams that gets Relegated to Norway’s Third Division.

Fun Fact:  Stabaek’s first team plays in Norway’s top flight.  They are awful.

RESULT:   Mjolner   4-3

  1. Melhus vs. Levanger II – Norway Third Division

Noob wasn’t kidding.  There’s a Trackable fourth division in Norway.  And we’re on it.  There are 84 teams at this level, broken up into six (presumably regional) Groups.

Four teams will get The Boot into the fifth division (yup, it exists!) from each Group at season’s end.  Group Five’s Levanger II are in second-to-last.  They couldn’t find the back of an opponent’s net if you set them inside it.  5th-place Melhus are pretty average, but could make a move up the table after whacking these weasels today.

Fun Fact:   Levanger (I) played in the Second Division.  They’re lousy, too!

RESULT:   3-3

  1. Lokomotiv Oslo vs. KFUM II – Norway Third Division

These are the 12th and 13th-place teams in Group One.  Noob Tracks and celebrates the downtrodden, but wouldn’t want to watch this one live.  Neither team scores much or really allows tons of goals.  This will be a zero-zero draw.

RESULT:   Lokomtiv   5-0    Well, Noob was sort of half-right…

Image result for lokomotiv oslo 2018

 

“Lokomotiv Oslo — we play behind a middle school.”

And their marketing department is hiring.

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Relegation Monday! Plus World Cup, Isle of Sodor Cup

The ten most important matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game.  It’s what we do.

Monday, we hit the few big games on the slates, then turn out attention to teams about to possibly be dropped from their leagues for putrid performance.  Relegation Monday!

  1. Iran vs. Portugal – FIFA World Cup

Time to start the third and final matches in Group B!

Iran is in 3rd and must win today to advance, despite being only one point behind Spain and Portugal both.  One of their best players has yet to break out and score, Sardar Azmoun.  He plays in the Russian Premier League, one of the top ten in UEFA.

Portugal would advance with even a draw.  It will be interesting to see what pace, how defensively they play.  They are tied with Spain on both points and goal differential, but behind on the next tie breaker (“Fair Play’ points).  Will Cristiano Ronaldo & Co. push for a win and hope Spain can’t beat already-eliminated Morocco?  Winning the Group makes a difference in where a team is seeded for the Knockout Stage.

And there you have it!  Mini-preview success.  Just enough to get you through water cooler-chat.  Now go, be free!  Noob will be searching out deeper pregame analysis, invites you to do likewise, Noobites.  Our education is important.   (2:00 PM Eastern, Fox, Telemundo)

RESULT:   1-1    Portugal advances, though Spain wins the group by virtue of the second tiebreaker (total goals scored, 6-5).

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He learned footyball powers.  

We can, too.

B.  Suddery vs. Wellsworth – Isle of Sodor Cup

Ah, the Capital.  it’s good to be back.   You are deserving of the distinction of Number B.

These are the last two teams to be playing their second of three Group Stage matches.  So far, every match in this Group has ended in a draw, so the action is hot.

Suddery will likely start in the Premier division this coming and first-ever league season on Sodor.  They aren’t expected to do better than midtable.  In future years, that could get worse, too.  Word already is that the Capital will have a second club before long.

Wellsworth are expected to play in the Second Division, yet probably be a relegation candidate.  Small town.

RESULT:   Wellsworth   3-4      Check out the Isle of Sodor Cup Page link near the upper right of the home page for standings.

Image result for The Rover's Return Isle of Man

 

 

Noob enjoyed drinking tonight with blind-Jeff Daniels and this other guy at Rover’s Return, Suddery.

  1. Thor Akureyri vs. Stjarnan – Iceland Cup

It’s the Quarterfinal knockout round in this FA Cup.  Thor Akureyri are one of two second-division clubs still playing.  They’re in 4th in their league.  Perennial power Stjarnan are #B in the Urvlasdield (top flight).  The home side’s name may sound cool, but they’d do well to keep this within a goal today.

RESULT:   Stjarnan   1-2

  1. Dinamo Brest vs. Gorodeya – Belarus Premier

Welcome back, Gorodeya!  Still in last place, Noob sees.  Good news though.  With a win, you’d climb over two clubs and out of the Drop Zone, for the moment.   A draw is far more likely though.  Why?  Midtable Dinamo Brest has earned draws in seven of their twelves games.

RESULT:   DB   5-2

 

 

Loving the font particularly

  1. Mariehamn vs. Kemi – Finland Veikkausliga

Kemi are in second-to-last place.  Whichever team finishes there will play a second-tier club for the right to play top-flight in 2019.

Mariehamn are one of the clubs that could end up there as well, just one spot higher in the table.  The home team today favors a higher-scoring game, so look for multiple goals both ways here.

Fun Fact:  The Kemi Kings have finished as high as 8th in Finland’s FA Cup

RESULT:   Mariehamn   2-1

  1. Pulau Pinang vs. PDRM – Malaysia Premier

Don’t be confused by the name – this is one of countries that uses “premier” to denote their second-highest league (“Super League” being higher).

Pulau Pinang are sort of in second-to-last.  Kuantan FA have been disqualified from play for financial issues, are listed with zero points, and appear set to be Relegated because of that.  P.P. can’t score, plain and simple.  PDRM are tied for #B, but have overachieved so far.   Could an upset be brewing?

RESULT:   Pinang   3-1     It’s a Relegation Monday miracle!

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Pinang Ultras Panthers supporters group throw toilet paper rolls on the pitch pregame traditionally.

  1. Aral Nukus vs. Xorazm – Uzbek Pro League A

Second-level Uzbek ball?  Yes, please!  Hey. They’re playing.

The league has just nine teams, yet two will be giving The Boot at season’s end.  Aral Nukus are in last.  Wanna know what’s Malay for “defense”?  Don’t ask Noob.  And don’t ask this club.  They’re the worst in that regard, and it’s not close.  Xorazm are midtable.

Fun Fact:   Aral Nukus played in the Soviet Second League for a deacde in the ’70s and ’80’s.

RESULT:   Xorazm   0-3

  1. Norin vs. Mash’al – Uzbek Pro League A

Double dip!  Norin are just a point ahead of Aral Nukus in the table, also in position to get moved down to Pro League B.  They will get housed by the league #1 today.  Worst offense, second-worst defense.

RESULT:   Norin   2-1    An even mightier Relegation Monday miracle!

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Norin’s Namangan region is famous for the  Beqasam (silk type) national dresses.

  1. Yozyovan vs. Lokomotiv BFK – Uzbek Pro League B

Hey, if you find a La Liga, Bundesliga, or English Premier match Noob’s not seeing on the world slate, lemme know.  Pretty sure they’re still in off-season.  So to the third tier we go!

This league is nine teams as well, also with two teams guaranteed to get moved down to the Regional Leagues.  BFK are in last, don’t look statistically like they have it in them to rise more than a spot in the table at best.  Fun-to-say Yozyovan are pretty average.

Fun Fact:   The Fergana Region where the village Yozyovan is located borders both Kyrgyzstan and Tajikistan

RESULT:   Yoz   2-1

10.  Matchakhela vs. Aragvi Dusheti – Georgia Liga III

Welcome back, last place-Matchakhela! The Track has missed you.  Still figuring out the rules, Noob sees.  Try scoring.  At all.  This will improve your chances.  #13 (of 20) Dusheti at home might be the best win you’re capable of snaring this year.

RESULT:   Dusheti   2-3

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The ancient Roman fortress Gonio in Matchakhela’s base town is rumored to be the burial place of the Apostle Matthew.

’10 to Track’ Weekend Edition (6/23-24) soccer matches – World Cup, Isle of Sodor Cup, MLS, NWSL y mas!

Join Noob for ten of the most important soccer matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game.  And for my on-site, seemingly exclusive online coverage of the inaugural Isle of Sodor Cup!

Saturday

  1. South Korea vs. Mexico – FIFA World Cup

South Korea lost their first match to Sweden here in Group, while Mexico stunned Germany 1-0.  They are ranked 57th and 15th in the world, respectively.

South Korea have a central midfielder who’s been playing for English Premier club Swansea City –Ki Sung-yeung.  Mexico may well decide to attack more from the edges so he’s not such a factor.

Mexico’s goal in Game One game from Hirving Lozano.  Can he strike again?

There you have it, Noobites!   Snack-sized preview to get you at least through water cooler chat.  noob will not have hurt feelings if you know go in search of even deeper pre-game analysis.  I’m going to certainly.  We learn, we grow.   (11:00 AM Eastern, Fox, Telemundo)

RESULT:   1-2   Mexico      No one is quite through or quite out yet, but these two are nearly so

Image result for water cooler chat funny

B.  New York Red Bulls vs. FC Dallas – MLS

Dallas have pulled into a tie for 1st place in the West with Kansas City.  Their five-match win streak is surely impressive.  It’s worth noting that the road wins have come against softer teams, because NYRB ain’t one.

Red Bulls bring the heat like anyone outside of Atlanta Utd.  They’re in 4th in the Eastern Conference, and have played one to three matches fewer than all the clubs ahead of them.  It’s strange.  They struggle some against teams from their region (except NYCFC), lay waste to most others.  If you like trends, put your money on the home side today.   (6:00 PM, Univision Deportes)

RESULT:   Red Bulls   3-0

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Number B, you are so money.

  1. LAFC vs. Columbus Crew – MLS

Our MLS undercard is hardly that as the conferences’ #3’s face off.

LAFC’s one recent league win was against league lowbies San Jose, and they needed two goals in the 90’ to achieve that much (3-4).

Columbus haven’t won since May, yet have mostly earned draws since that time to keep them well afloat in the table.  Their superb goalkeeping was bound to come back to earth a little after an amazing spring stretch. Can Zach Steffen recapture the magic?   (10:30 PM, ESPN+)

  1. Seattle Reign vs. North Caroline Courage – NWSL

It’s #B versus #1!   That will always have a certain luster.  Yet make no mistake, Seattle is a big underdog at home to the locomotive that is NCC.  The league’s only about a dozen games in and the Courage already lead by 11 points in the table.

Still, Seattle hasn’t conceded a goal in three straight matches, and NCC actually let lowly Houston draw with them their last match.

RESULT:   Courage   1-4

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Umm…thanks, Chuck!

  1. Junction & Sheds vs. Killdane – Isle of Sodor Cup

Junction & Sheds (Knapford) aren’t expected to be quite as strong as Knapford Town in the inaugural IoS Premier League coming in a few months, but they’ll be plenty competitive.  They’re one of three teams here in Group G with three points, so simply getting a draw today would hardly guarantee them advancement to the Knockout Round.

Killdane already knocked of a future Premier side in Ulfstead, so they won’t be intimidated.  Perhaps they should be though.  J&S won that first match of theirs by a Cup-largest margin of seven goals (1-8).  Killdane are expected to be a midtable side in the Second Division.

RESULT:   Killdane   1-5!     All of Group G is knotted up at three points apiece with just a match to go each.

Sunday

  1. England vs. Panama – FIFA World Cup

#55 FIFA-ranked Panama needs at least a draw to stay alive in Group G.  A win would guarantee #12 England advancement to the Knockout Round, though they’d need a big one to pass Denmark on goal differential for the Group lead.

England had a sensational first half against Tunisia, likely should’ve won by more than 1-2 as they did.   In all recent major tournaments, they struggle early and often, so “The Three Lions” are thrilled to have a W already.

Panama played a very, very physical style against Belgium, leaving things tied 0-0 at the half before Belgium solved them for a 3-0 win.  England should handle them, but this will be a different challenge presented.

Oh, and England’s coach dislocated his shoulder somehow.   And there you have it!  Mini-preview to get you through water cooler chat-level convo for tomorrow’s biggest WC match.  Now go, be free!  Explore more in-depth pregame schtuff if you are so inclined.  Noob will.  We’re all learning.   8:00 AM Eastern, FS1, Telemundo)

RESULT:   England   6-1

Image result for water cooler funny

  1. Atlanta United vs. Portland Timbers – MLS

Atlanta are perhaps the best team in all the league, and currently sit atop the Eastern Conference.  There can be little doubt Portland are the hottest team.  They had a rough start to 2018, but are now unbeaten in ten straight and are 6th in the West.

It’s the defense that’s got both clubs in playoff slots in the table.  The back lines are key for both sides.  Neither goalkeeper is in the top ten in saves, but ATL’s Brad Guzan has more in today’s matchup.  He played nine seasons in the English Premier League.  Can he keep a clean sheet today?   (4:30 PM, Fox)

RESULT:   1-1

  1. Kirk Ronan vs. Dryaw – Isle of Sodor Cup

Cabalnoo lead Group B, stunningly, are the only one of the four with a win.  All others have ties here, so if either can win this match outright today, we have a real race on our hands.

Dryaw had a weird, scoreless match with Norramby in their first and only match so far.  Defense isn’t a very Sudric thing in football.  Even given that, the ten goals Kirk Ronan conceded against Cabalnoo still has our heads shaking.  Perhaps at home the larger Churchmen club can right things.

RESULT:   Kirk Ronan   4-3

Image result for unique church isle of man

 

Eeriest B&B in the world might be the original Ronan church (“kirk”) where Noob is staying.

  1. Kairat Almaty vs. Astana – Kazakhstan Premier

#B versus #1!   And in a way it’s even tighter.  Kairat Almaty are only five points behind the traditional league power and they’ve played two fewer games.  More, they’ve only lost once.  Astana has already taken two L’s.

Still, Noob’s not ready to call this one for the home team.  Astana would feel fine about a draw and can control the ball enough to get it.

RESULT:   Astana   1-2

  1. BATE Borisov vs. Shakhtyor Soligorsk – Belarus Premier

BATE is the historic great from this domestic lead, and they’re #1 again now.  But #4 Soligorsk have the best defense in the league.  BATE have to be favored, especially at home – and with the best offense to boot.  Still, this could end up the surprise upset of leagues today.

RESULT:   0-0

Image result for Barysaw strange

 

 

If Noob weren’t in Kirk Ronan, Sodor for the Cup, I’d be saying, “So long from beautiful Barysaw, Belarus!”

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Globetrotting Friday (6/22) – World Cup, Isle of Sodor Cup, and off to footyball hinterlands!

‘The ten most important soccer matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game.’

On Fridays, that gets messed with.  We look at a couple matches that “matter” and then jetset off for wild and exotic football locales!  A little learning, a lot of fun, and you may just end up more edumuhcated than your soccer fan veteran friends.

Liftoff!

  1. Brazil vs. Costa Rica – FIFA World Cup

Welcome back to Group E!   All four teams have played a match now.  Serbia were the only to get a win, beating Noob-surrogates Costa Rica.  Brazil had a draw with the Swiss.

Costa Rica are the Noob choice for the Group Stage for the cheering.  They’re ranked almost right next to the U.S. worldwide, so seem a good surrogate for how ‘Muricuh might’ve fared.

There have been multiple arguments, with at least one broadcast live in their home country, between Costa Rica players since their first match in Russia.  Brazilian star Cutinho will likely be able to take advantage – or just win on having superior players.  They’re ranked #2 in the world for a reason.

There you have it, Noobites!   Just enough preview to get you through water cooler chat.  Now go, be free!  Noob will be reading more in-depth stuff on the interwebs in advance of the match.  Do likewise, should the Spirit move you.

RESULT:   Brazil   2-0    And with that, sadly Noob-fave Costa Rica is eliminated

Image result for water cooler chat funny

B.  Houston Dash vs. Portland Thorns – NWSL

*shakes fist at Houston*   Swamp City-builders!  You don’t build on marshland.  Noob and The Management stand against you.

OK, with that bit of oddity out of the way, second-to-last place Houston have taken advantage of three straight home matches to put some distance between themselves and Washington.  They’re even within striking distance of the top four and a postseason berth!  They beat Washington, surprised Seattle with a W, and then most impressively earned a draw against league champions-in-waiting North Carolina.

To compare, 5th-place Portland got dubbed 1-4 by NC.  In general, they are fading.  They need to find their offense again or will wind up the next Dash victim.

RESULT:   Portland   1-3

Image result for letter B swamp monster

 

 

Number B is here to scare some sense into you, Houstonians.

  1. Tampa Bay Rowdies vs. Penn FC – USL

For newer Noobites, let’s get real:   Often locale will trump “quality”.

TB and Penn are merely tied for 10thh in the Eastern Conference.   In Noob’s quest to himself learn and then in turn introduce you to soccer that could be most important to you, we’re going to get to know teams close to home.  Even when they’re potential also-rans in the second tier.

But hey — they’re only two points out of 8th and the league playoffs, so this is something of a key match!  If the match isn’t a draw, the mountain the loser has to climb gets really tough, even here at about the season halfway point.

The Rowdies are the better team, have the offense to perhaps make that move toward 8th.  At home, they should handle the team we knew last year as Harrisburg City.

RESULT:   Penn FC   0-2

  1. Arlesburgh vs. Brendam Harbor – Isle of Sodor Cup

Future Second Division Arlesburgh are the only team in Group D to net a win.  Any sort of result over one of the tourney-faves Brendam Harbor and they will be looking prime to advance to the knockout stage.

The Harbormen only managed a draw against D2 Lakeside in their first match.  They’ll be looking to break out the offense today and move toward the bracketed round.  They’re on the road for their second consecutive match, and so are slated to host their third and final one Arlesdale United.

Fun Fact:  Arlesburgh is perhaps the oldest settlement on Sodor.  As such, they have one of the largest supporter groups on Sodor – The Ancients.

RESULT:   Brendam Harbor  1-2

The fans dress like old people, stand entire matches.   The ones who look just middle-aged are, in fact, toddlers.

Image result for old people cheering

  1. Spartaks vs. RFS – Latvia Higher League

UEFA’s 41st-ranked league is strange in one regard:  About a dozen matches into the season, 1st and 5th place are separated by eight points.  5th and 6th are separated by twelve.

Spartaks are in 4th, but have played one less game than the two teams immediately ahead of them.  They are also the last team to beat #1 RFS.   The visitor’s today sport the best offense in the league.

Fun Fact:  FK Spartaks is closely identified as much or more with their Swimming School.

RESULT:   RFS   0-2

  1. Soccernet vs. FCI Levadia – Estonia FA Cup

The point here is just to know that the event is happening, really.  Both teams are from Tallinn The home side is from the 6th tier of Latvian domestic footyball.  FCI Levadia is one of the top-flight league powerhouses.

RESULT:   FCI Levadia   0-12       Words fail sometimes…

Image result for gif the more you know funny

  1. Than Quang Ninh vs. Sanna Khanh Hoa – Vietnam V.League 1

They’re all chasing Ha Noi in Vietnam for the only AFC Champions League slot the league receives.  They won’t be caught.  We’re still going!

#B hosts #4 in a very crowded part of the table.  Today’s visitors from Nha Trang have overachieved a little being even this high up.  Their negative goal differential gives them away.  TQN aren’t posers, might be the only team that could get a sniff at catching Ha Noi.

Fun Fact:   TQN have only two players who are not Vietnamese.  Both are Brazilian.

RESULT:   SKH   1-2

  1. EB / Streymur vs. KI – Faroe Islands Premier

Welcome to the track, Faroe Islands!   You’re an independent country that is somehow also part of the Kingdom of Denmark.  And we love you.  Despite or maybe even because you’re the 51st-ranked UEFA club of 55.

Unsurprisngly, Faroe Islands only get one team into the Champions League.  it’s a two-horse race, and KI are behind the league leaders by five in the table.  Matches against midtable teams like EB / Streymur are exactly the kind they can’t drop.  They likely won’t even, on the road.  KI is much better on both sides of the ball, can control this game no matter what sort of pace their hosts try for.

UnFun Fact:   In 2014, perhaps EB’s greatest player was killed when a bunch of boxes of frozen fish fell on him when he was on a trawler.

RESULT:   KI   0-2

Image result for gunnar zachariasen

 

 

Too sad and weird for Noob to have made this one up.

  1. Voorwaarts vs. Inter Moengotapoe – Suriname Topklasse

Inter is sort of the best of the rest in Suriname.  The title chase is down to three teams nearly two dozen games into their season.  I.M. are 4th.  Voorwaarts are 9th.

Despite the country being not far off the Brazilian coast, this is a Caribbean-cultured nation.  And they are in CONCACF, not CONMEBOL.  Noob welcomes you to the track!

Fun Fact:   S.V. Voorwaarts was founded in 1919 by schoolkids from the Hendrickschool.

RESULT:   2-2

  1. Fosa Juniors vs. Meava – Madagascar Champions League

It’s an avalanche of newcomers to the Track today!    Good luck on your season that’s just starting.

This league is divided into four Groups.  These two finished in the middle of their zones last season.  That’s all Noob’s got for you on this one.  But they’re on our radar now, and we’ll be back to learn more some Friday soon.

Fun Fact:  Fosa Juniors are from the region of Boeny in the northeast, pop. around 800,000.

RESULT:   Fosa Juniors   3-0

Image result for village straddling river

 

So long from scenic Arlesburgh, Isle of Sodor!

Be jealous of Noob’s eleveted B&B.

’10 to Track’ Midweek Edition soccer matches (6/19-21) – World Cup, Isle of Sodor Cup lead the way

The ten most important matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game.  Noob’s mantra.  It’s mostly Cup action for the midweek, FIFA World and Isle of Sodor.

Noob’s on a whirlwind tour of Sodor, hustling from one village or town to the next each day for matches as I continue my seemingly exclusive online coverage.  To this end, I’m posting just the two feature matches for Tuesday from here in Glennock, even though the train ride to Crovan’s Gate for tomorrow’s key game isn’t long, even by Sodor standards.

Tuesday

  1. Colombia vs. Japan – FIFA World Cup

Welcome to Group G.  All four teams here play their first match today.  Favorite Poland face off against Senegal.  #16 FIFA-ranked Colombia is likely to be the other one to advance.  Japan are just #61 in the world.

Colombia seem an interesting case.  In the last friendlies before a major event, teams begin letting their likely starters play together.  No more auditions, so to speak.  They actually beat France not long ago, but then only managed scoreless draws against Tunisia and Australia leading up to WC.

Lowly Japan actually managed a win against a decent non-Cup-Bound Paraguay side in their last match.  They haven’t tested themselves against the caliber of competition they’ll face here in Russia, and they didn’t perform well even against those teams by and large.

And there’s your water cooler chat-level mini-preview!   Now go, be free!  Dig deeper on the interwebs for more in-depth pre-game analysis.  Noob will.  But this is what we do here.   (8:00 AM Eastern, FS1)

RESULT:   Japan   1-2     But anything is possible when one team is down a man after just three minutes!   Colombia lost a man to a red card for a handball in the box.  Japan scored the ensuing penalty, gave up the lead, then reclaimed it in the second half.  

Senegal also upset Poland 1-2 today in this Group, so it’s going to be a wild one!

Image result for water cooler chat funny

B.  Crovan’s Gate vs. Brendam United – Isle of Sodor Premier

Welcome back to Group A.  One of the event’s favorites – Brendam Utd. lost by a bad 0-3 margin, even if it was to fellow future IoS Premier Leaguers Tidmouth Works.  We’ll see if that was a wake-up call and they put a hurting on Crovan’s Gate.

CG only lost their first Cup match by two, but it was to Toryreck – a qualifier that will be in the bottom division when leagues’ officially form and kick off in a few months.  And CG gave up five goals.  They’ll be playing in the middle of three domestic divisions.

Image result for Crovan's gate

 

 

Here Noob comes!

 

 

Wednesday

  1. Iran vs. Spain – FIFA World Cup

Portugal and Spain played a match for the ages a few days ago, ending in a 3-3 draw.  Spain will be looking for three points here against the second-highest ranked Asian team (but FIFA-ranked just #37).  Iran got a surprising 1-0 win over Morocco.  Even a draw somehow today keeps them very much alive to advance.

This is an interesting matchup for a couple reasons style- and player-wise.   Diego Costa scored two goals for Spain against Portugal, but may not have room to operate against Iran – a tight defensively-oriented side.  A more creative player like Isco may be one to watch setting up unique opportunities in the front third.

Spain showed some defensive problems in that first match.  Some will argue that might help Iran.  But Iran is going to have trouble possessing the ball at all to try and score as Spain presses.

And there you have it, Noobites!  Water cooler chat-level mini-preview success.  Now go, be free!  Noob is out there reading more in-depth preview analysis and invites you to do likewise.   (2:00 PM, Fox)

RESULT:   Spain   0-1      Isco was your Man of the Match with his ball control, passing

  1. LAFC vs. Sacramento Republic – U.S. Open Cup

The second four matches of the Round of 16 in America’s FA Cup are all today.  This is the one that features the only non-MLS side remaining.

Sacramento Republic are out of the second division-USL.  They finished 8th in the Western Conference last year, just making the playoffs.  This season, they’re in a surprising third place– despite some offensive trouble.

MLS-expansion LAFC is all the way up in 3rd as well in their West.    They struggle on defense, but score like it’s going out of style.  It’s unfortunate for Sacramento the draw for home pitch didn’t go their way.  This may not be competitive.  But everyone loves a Minnow (non-top division underdog), so Noob’ll be pulling for ‘em!

RESULT:   LAFC   3-2     High drama!   Equalizer at 68′, then the go-ahead by aptly-named Latif Blessing at 89′.

Image result for minnow love

 

 

 

Boooooo.  BOOOOO!

  1. Vicarstown vs. Peel Godred – Isle of Sodor Cup

Hello from Barrow, England!  Look, Noob enjoys Vicarstown the town, but somehow being in Barrow just makes me feel more… real, somehow.  Grounded?  Maybe.  But I’ll be crossing the bridge from Cumbria to The Isle for this super duper Group H matchup!

Group favorite Peel scored a narrow victory over future-second division club Callan FC 2-1.  Now they hit the road to face Vicarstown, a team that is expected to finish at the bottom of the coming Premier League.  They were upset 1-2 at Elsbridge in their first match.

Given that the nature of football play on Sodor has been so loosely organized, it’s hard to handicap games here.  Things will be clearer after a couple years of formal league play, which starts in a few months.  They don’t formally gamble on Sodor, but Noob did throw down a few quid on V-town just because it’s home for them.  Another advantage to sleeping on the English side of Walney Channel.

RESULT:   Vicarstown   5-1          And just like an Iranian fan’s wallet did the fire-trick which he used to try and light a cigarette at his teams World Cup match against Argentina today, a women’s whole purse went up when in a similar incident outside the venue.  High drama!

  1. O’Higgins vs. Colchagua – Copa Chile

Now here’s a Minnow-match!

This is the Second Round of Chile’s FA Cup, the stage at which the 16 Premier teams enter the competition.  O’Higgins is a midtable club from that league.

Colchagua plays in the Segunda Division – the third tier of football in Chile – where they are #B in the table.  These two are from the same geographic area and are very much rivals.   The first match of this two-legged tie ended in a 1-1 draw.  Expecting Colchagua to manage as much and more on the road today is a lot.  But here’s to hoping!

RESULT:   Colchagua   0-0  /  5-6 pk      Somehow Noob had some wrong info on this one.  The first match had ended in a scoreless draw.  Still — Minnow success!

Image result for colchagua football crest

 

 

Uh oh.

Don’t let the luck run out of that horseshoe, boys.

  1. KuPS vs. HJK – Finland Veikkausliga

The Finnish top flight is the lowest-ranked of the Nordic domestic leagues.  But hey– they’re playing!

When Noob first scouted and selected this match, it was a mighty #B/#1 matchup.  Since then, RoPS have overtaken KuPS for Bth place (boy do the Finns love their alphabet soup).  No matter.  Everyone is chasing defending champs HJK again this season.

KuPS lead the league in offense, but barely over HJK – which has the far superior defense.   If the pace is hot, KuPS can win a shootout today in front of the home fans.

RESULT:   2-2

Thursday

  1. Argentina vs. Croatia – FIFA World Cup

One of the bigger stories early on has been that Iceland managed a draw against Argentina in their first match.  The good news for Argentina:  They dominated Iceland statistically.  The bad news:  This continues a trend of not performing well in recent months against WC-level competition.  Friendlies are only that, but patterns are hard to ignore.  The #5-ranked team in the world should be doing better.

Croatia took care of business against Nigeria with a 2-0 win in their first game.  Any result here puts them in excellent position to advance.  Look for them to try and keep the game slow-paced.

Key players:  If you’re following football at all, you know Messi.  Even Noob and Noobites.  Veteran Luka Modric (who plays for Real Madrid) is the name to watch for with Croatia.  He plays midfield.

Additional note:  Croatia sent a team member home after he refused to come on as a sub in their first match.  Not the biggest controversy, but any distraction can obviously get magnified at World Cup.

RESULT:   Croatia   0-3    Argentina may be about to be out of contention to advance!   Modric salted this one away with a screamer from above the box to make it 0-2.  

The first goal happened when back-up goalkeeper Cabellero failed to clear a back pass, instead lofting a little pass, basically, to an opposing player who howled it in.

Image result for go to your room funny

Noob hopes this is exactly how that played out.

  1. Colo-Colo vs. Atletico Ñublense – Copa Chile

Not to make it about Noob, but if you don’t think I’m not rooting for Ñublense forever and ever just because of their club name pronunciation, you’re cray-cray.

More, they stunned the famed powerhouse Primera club 2-0 in the first match of this two-legged tie!    The Longaniza Mecánica are currently in 4th place in the second-tier Primera B.  The other teams right around them look stronger there (they struggle a bit on offense), making their progress in the Copa all the more awesome.

Colo-Colo have also had problems scoring goals in league this season.  The defending champions are in just 6th.  Still, they’re in different leagues for a reason.  Colo-Colo will win at home today.  The question is simply will they win by enough to advance to the bracketed stage next.

RESULT:    Colo Colo   2-1      And so it’s Noob-lense that advances, on aggregate 2-3!

  1. Norramby vs. Cabalnoo – Isle of Sodor Cup

Noob loves Norramby.  Reminds me of Bournemouth, which is a Noob-fave club.  Little resort town of sorts.  They’ll be playing in the inaugural second division of the three formally starting next year on Sodor.

Cablalnoo is a small village, pretty close to far larger Kirk Ronan.  They will play in the bottom division, played through qualifiers to get here.  They got a surprising 5-5 draw against their larger rivals in their first match!  Norramby played Dryaw to a scoreless draw.  They don’t play a lot of defense on Sodor, so this is the anti-double rainbow of footyball happenings here.

So, Group B is wide open.  Can little ‘Noo surprise with another result today?

RESULT:   Cabalnoo   5-10    A Sudric suprise for the soccer ages!   Norramby really need the two middle teams in Group B to have a draw in their upcoming match.

Image result for isle of man cafe

 

 

 

So long from the IsleSound Cafe, Norramby!  

 

’10 to Track’ Relegation Monday soccer matches – World Cup, US Open, Isle of Sodor, and suckitude!

Since the FIFA World Cup is likely bringing fresh Noobite eyes to this humble site, allow Nob to explain:

On Mondays, world soccer schedules tend to be lighter than other times.  Stands to reason, given the weekend is heavy.  So the usual ‘ten most important matches to follow for us – the newish American fans of the global game – takes this turn:

A few top matches get featured, but we mostly embrace the suckitude, preview matches in which at least one club is in position to be Relegated to a lower league st season’s end.  Come, get to know some sad sack-squads before they fade away!

  1. Tunisia vs. England – FIFA World Cup

Welcome to Group G.  These two have been drawn with Belgium (the favorites) and Panama (very not favored).  This is the first match for these teams.  Reminder:  Round-robin in each Group, top two finishers advance.

The most likely drama in G is between these two for finishing behind Belgium and advancing to the Knockout Stage.  Tunisia is the top-ranked team out of Africa (FIFA #21).  England are tied for 12th with Denmark.

England have not won the World Cup since 1966, always seem to feel lots of pressure and then underperform in major tournaments.  This team isn’t as star-studded as some of the past, as they focus on a youth movement and defense.  What offense they do manage to produce will probably run through  Tottenham  Sir Toppem Hatt Hotspur star Harry Kane.  (Yes, Noob still loathes Hotspur — named for a historical traitor!)  Other star Marcus Rashford seems to be over his recent injury.

And there you have it, you’re water cooler chat-level mini-preview.  Be free!   Go search out more in-depth coverage should you desire, Noobites.  I’m doing so.   (2:00 PM Eastern, FS1)

RESULT:   England   1-2    Harry Kane with a brace (two goals)!

Image result for harry kane funny

 

 

You’re a poor man’s Ryan Gosling, Harry Kane.

 B.  Houston Dynamo vs. Minnesota United – U.S. Open Cup

The American FA Cup has reached its Round of 16.  Only one non-MLS team advanced this far, Sacramento Republic of the USL (and formerly NASL).

Here, we get two Western Conference clubs on the outside looking in right now for league postseason berths.  They’re in 7th and 9th place, respectively.  Dreaded Houston (down with cities built on swamps!) is much better than shown in the table so far though.  Mark Noob’s words:  They’ll not only make the playoffs, they’ll have home pitch advantage for at least one game.

Minnesota can’t score worth a lick.  They will be lambasted this Round of the Cup.

RESULT:   Houston   1-0

Image result for letter B cup

 

 

 

Number B enjoys the Cup matches as a cup, of sorts.

  1. Glennock vs. Junction & Sheds – Isle of Sodor Cup

Noob’s exclusive coverage of the Isle of Sodor inaugural Cup returns!  Hello from the small village of Glennock, located well inland in the east-central portion of the country.  They are one of the four clubs to advance out of qualifiers that took place in the spring.  They will play in the third and bottom division of the Sodor football pyramid when everything launches this coming season.

The larger town of Knapford sends one of their two teams for battle today.  Talk Noob catches locally indicates J&S will probably be a lower midtable team in the coming Premier League.  They are the favorites to win Group F.

RESULT:   J&S   1-8     Kary Hanesworth scored for Glennock scored first, but after that it was all carnage

  1. Dinamo Minsk vs. Vitebsk – Belarus Premier

Belarus’ top league falls smack into the middle of UEFA’s associations rankings.  Usual powerhouse BATE Borisov have a wide lead built, given that they’re not halfway through their season.

The most likely club to possibly catch them appears to be #B Dinamo Minsk.  They’ve got the defense, but no one’s offense there measures up to BATE’s.  #4 Vitebsk isn’t many points further back, but they’re just not traditionally at the table’s top.

RESULT:   1-1

And now we embrace the suckitude with Relegation matches!

Image result for Dinamo Minsk

 

 

Noob likes the crest, even if it does look like could be a brand logo on ice cream or something.

  1. Gomel vs. Smolevichy – Belarus Premier

Welcome back to the Track, Smolevichy!  They’re in an easier part of their schedule, as Noob recently featured them on a Monday playing another league bottom-feeder.

Talkin’ ‘bout you, Gomel.  Can’t score more than about a goal every three games on average, gonna get Relegated.  They’re in a three-way tie for the two Relegation spots now.  Still, this might be a gettable match for them.  Smolevichy plays small ball, so to speak, so this will be a low-scoring game.  First side to score – at all – wins.

Not-So-Fun Fact:  Gomel is close enough to Chernobyl that it was part of the radiation zone.  The population had been declining all the way until the early 2000’s.

RESULT:   Smoley   0-2

  1. Kyzylzhar Petropavlovsk vs. Shakhtar Karagandy – Kazakhstan Premier

My Scrabble dictionary just broke up with me for typing your club name.  Thanks, K.P.

The home side is tied for 10th, which would put them in a Playoff with a top second-division team trying to move up and usurp their place.  They also play so little defense, Noob’s not convinced they formally play a goalie.  Karagandy is in 8th.

Fun Fact:  Petropavl is named for the Christian apostles Peter and Paul

RESULT:   K.P.   1-0     Funner Fact:   It’s a Relegation Monday miracle!

Image result for angry book

 

 

Fine, Noob will just rebound with a Bartlett’s Book of Quotations.

  1. Independiente de Valle vs. Deportivo Cuenca – Ecuador Serie A

8th place hosts second-to-last in our one South American stop today.  IdV is only 8th, but Cuenca…. maybe they could pool their money with Karagandy above and split a goalie’s services.   (8:15 PM, GOL TV)

RESULT:   IdV   3-1

  1. Notre Dame vs. BDF – Barbados Premier

When Noob Tweets his regular announcement promoting the Track, if you don’t think I’m not hashtagging Notre Dame, you’re crazy.

The top tier league in Barbados just expanded this season from a ten-team, single group affair to a divided, two-“zone”, 12-team league.   Noobs Barbados source indicates that the bottom two teams in each Zone are below a line.  It seems doubtful they’re giving a third of the league The Boot, so more likely is that the four clubs will have a mini-tournament to determine which one or two move down

If Notre Dame can kick their offense up a notch, they may overtake one of the two teams just ahead of them.  That won’t happen today though.  BDF is the Zone 2 leader by a billion miles.  Noob would handicap this match by granting ND four goals.

RESULT:   BDF   0-6     Not a typo.   At four goals, Noob didn’t handicap Notre Dame enough.  Yikes.

Fun Fact:   Notre Dame play on the south side of the capital, Bridgetown – which used to be called The Town of St. Michael.  The area parish still carries that name.

Image result for Notre Dame university funny

 

 

 

 

Right, what she said.  Signed.  Whatever.

  1. Zakho vs. Naft – Iraq Premier

This is to Mondays in a row, Zakho.  In last by six points, Noob suspects you’ll be here enough I have to charge you rent.  Worse luck, you play the #4 and best defensive team in the league today.  Good luck with that.

Fun Fact:   “Zakho” might well mean either “victory” or “river of blood”, either likely stemming from an ancient Roman-Persian battle there.

RESULT:   Naft   0-2

  1. Shukura vs. WIT Georgia – Georgia Erovnuli Liga 2

Hey, Noob’s featured the third tier TWICE.  This is a step up in, er, toward relevance.

This league is strange.  Other than second-place Norchi Dinamo, every team here looks about the same on offense, statistically.  Last-place Shukura, however, seemingly enjoys just watching balls flutter by into their goal.  Only one team gets Dropped from this league at season’s end, and Shukura look like it by a wide berth.  #1 WIT Georgia will get the road W, riding their supreme defense.

Fun Fact:   Shukura are based in Kobuleti, a seaside resort town that’s super-popular with Armenian tourists.

RESULT:   1-1

Image result for Kobuleti beautiful

 

 

Were Noob not in Sodor, I’d be saying so long from Hotel Chveni Ezo in Kobleti.

’10 to Track’ soccer matches for Globetrotting Friday (6/15) – give Noobites more World Cup, Isle of Sodor footyball!

TGIGF!  “The ten most important matches for us – the newish American fans of the global game – to follow.”  Noob hopes the advent if the World Cup has brought many new patrons so that you can learn some fun stuff about the game, its leagues and such.

There are three World Cup matches today, and it goes without saying that all are “more important” than anything else going on in the football-world.  Noob plans on just previewing one each day early on, with priority given to CONCACAF, top-ranked Euro, South American, and other world teams, in that order.

Noob will continue to spend much of this space on top matches from other domestic leagues and cup tournaments, if for no other reason than to be different from the myriad of other soccer coverage out there.

  1. Portugal vs Spain – FIFA World Cup

#4 versus #10 FIFA-ranked teams in the world face off here.  These two are expected to advance as the top finishers in this Group, and easily.  The question will be who actually wins the Group, which will matter for Knockout Round seeding.

Ronaldo for Portugal and Silva for Spain are the two biggest stars playing today in a match bursting with them.  Also, and strangely – Spain fired their undefeated head coach two days ago.  What the fruit?

There.  Just enough to get you through water cooler-level chat.  Noob knows more in-depth coverage is out there.  I’ll be checking it out and learning myself!

RESULT:   3-3        A match for the ages!   Ronaldo with all three goals for Spain and Diego Costa with a pair for Portugal.

Image result for water cooler chat funny

B.  Castle Rolf vs. Suddery – Isle of Sodor Premier Cup

Three matches today in the IOS Cup.  This is the best one, as two Group E teams from the Premier League clash.  Castle Rolf finished 5th in the last PL table.  Suddery has an uncharacteristically poor year, sliding to 9th.

Castle Rolf have the closest thing to a good defense on Sodor.  They gave up just 1.1 goals per match  last season.  Suddery seemed to be victims of bad luck, leading the league in shots that hit woodwork by a wide margin (39!)

RESULT:   4-4

Image result for Rowlf muppets

 

Wrong.  Rolf.

At least Noob assumes so.  Sodor is an odd place…

3.  Cobresal vs. CD Everton – Copa Chile

It’s the Second Round in Chile’s FA Cup and 32 teams remain.  This match should be a doozie.  Cobresal are the top performer this year in the country’s second division.  C.D. Everton are in dead last in the Primera Division.

The first match of this two-legged tie at C.D.E. ended in a scoreless draw.  Noob still thinks Cobresal will be over-performing if they keep this one a draw again and force penalty kicks.  They’re in different leagues for a reason, plain and simple.

Fun Fact:  El Salvador, Actama, Chile is more mining camp than anything else, where Cobresal are from.

RESULT:   Cobresal   1-1  /  4-5 pk

  1. Ventsplis vs. Spartaks – Latvian Higher League

Welcome to the 41st-ranked league (of 54) in Europe.  Impressive?  Perhaps not.  But as Noob is taking to saying this time of year – hey, they’re playing!

These two are #B and #3 in this eight-team league.  They’re pretty even statistically.  RFS is the class and goal-scoring machine of this league.

RESULT:   Spartaks   1-2

FK Ventspils.png

 

 

Ventsplis’ crest is solid enough, yet would look even better as a key chain.

  1. Plavinas DM vs. Auda – Latvia Cup

Let’s double dip in Lativia!  Second Round action, 32 teams remain.  Unlike in Chile, this tournament is Knockout – one match and done.

Noob doesn’t have a lot to add for this one; just know that it’s happening.  Plavinas DM are a third-tier team, but I have no idea of what quality.  Auda are a second-division side, 8th place.

Fun Fact:  On Mythbusters, the idea that double-dipping a chip into dip spread as much bacteria as just sticking one’s whole mouth in the dip was debunked.

RESULT:   Auda   1-9    not a typo

  1. Brittons Hill vs. Weymouth Wales – Barbados Premier

This league is divided into what they label “zones”, as opposed to divisions.  These two are 1st and 3rd in one of them.

Each zone this year has one team absolutely laying waste to the rest.  Weymouth Wales is one of those.  They’ve outscored teams this year by a ridiculous 36-5 margin.  They’ll be playing Barbados Defence Force from the other zone for the league title eventually.

RESULT:   1-1

Image result for 2018 Brittons Hill FC

 

 

The best players in Barbados can shoot Spidey-webs..

  1. APR vs. Rayon Sports – Rwanda National League

Rwandan top-flight teams have done just enough to move into the CAF rankings for next year, moving into a tie for 26th.  Hey, they’re playing!

APR are #B and part of a two-team race for this league’s title and CAF Champions League berth.  Rayon Sports are just a spot back, but seven points behind them and the season is over two dozen matches in.  Apr are better on both sides of the ball, if not by leaps and bounds.  This is a key home match to not blow if they want to keep pace with AS Kigali.

Fun Fact:  APR stands for Armée Patriotique Rwandaise (FC)

RESULT:   APR   2-1

  1. Sporting de Cabinda vs. Kabuscorp – Angola Girabola

Angola’s top league climbed to #13 in this year’s continental rankings – just one spot shy of earning themselves a second CAF Champions League berth.

Kabuscorp are in a three-way tie for 1st place.  Noob read somewhere that this club had been penalized table points for financial naughtinesses, but such is not reflected in the table out there Noob most trusts.

Kabuscorp is the offensive terror of the league.  This is a bad matchup for mid-table SdC, as they have trouble scoring.

RESULT:     now slated for tomorrow

Cabinda (red), exclave of Angola

 

 

 

That shaded area is the exclave province of Cabinda, separated from the country by DR Congo territory.

  1. Cheng Fung vs. Alfandega – Macao Premier

This is the 33rd-ranked league in Asia, of 46 associations.  The real battle in this one will be between #B and 3rd place.  Cheng Fung is in 4th.  Today is a day they can start to make a move on placing, Alfandega are last place with just one win and no draws in 15 matches.

Noob handicaps this match at +5 goals.  Alfandega have only scored 5 all year while allowing a staggering 79.

Fun Fact:  That’s a really, really bad goal differential.

RESULT:   Cheng Fung   1-0     Everybody have fun tonight.  Everybody Cheng Fung.

  1. Guarani vs. Sao Bento – Brazil Serie B

10th versus 6th doesn’t sound like much, but the top four get promoted to Serie A at season’s end.  Sao Bento haven’t shown yet that they have offense to compete with the top contenders here.  These need to pick up evenly-matched road games like these to hope to make the climb.

Fun Fact:  Sao Bento’s club was founded by horse tack manufacture employees.

RESULT:   0-0

Image result for Sorocaba funny

 

 

 

So long from Cateye-witness News newscat and me.  Sorocaba, Sao Bento, Brazil.  Signing off.